


Baby Remember, I'm Not Drinking Wine, but that Cherry Coke You Serve is Fine

by Tonicheryltopaz



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bartender Toni, Cheryl is dealing with a lot, Drinking, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/F, Protective Toni Topaz, Sad Cheryl Blossom, Some Similar Themes, Whyte Wrym, serpents
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2021-01-10
Packaged: 2021-02-28 18:42:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 34,453
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23191822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tonicheryltopaz/pseuds/Tonicheryltopaz
Summary: I bought me a truck in the middle of the nightIt'll buy me a year if I play my cards rightPhoto free exits from baby's bedside'Cause they don't yet know what car I driveI'm just tryna keep my love aliveWith my bartender, hold me all nightBartender, our love's aliveBaby remember, I'm not drinking wineBut that cherry coke you serve is fineAnd our love's sweet enough on the vineBartender, bartenderCheryl is on the run from her past and meets the lovely Toni Topaz in the process who comes in the form of a small town bartender who is more than willing to help her deal with her trauma.
Relationships: Cheryl Blossom/Toni Topaz, Fangs Fogarty & Toni Topaz, Sweet Pea & Toni Topaz
Comments: 93
Kudos: 198





	1. Jack and Coke

**Author's Note:**

> Soooo this is a little fic I started that I felt the inspiration for while listening to Lana Del Rey's song Bartender which those are the lyrics in the summary above because idk how to write summaries. I wasn't going to post this quite yet but since everyone is kinda indoors right now, I thought the more to read the better...maybe??? Plus I am avoiding finishing Vegas cuz I don't want it to end so avoidance is the answer at the moment. This will be short prolly only 5 chapters maybe 4. Updates will be rando af.
> 
> A couple notable things, it is all focused on Cheryl as far as dealing with trauma she has been through so keep a look out for any trigger warnings. There will be some stuff that's canon but I like to veer off the beaten path so there will be similar themes but they may have unfolded differently. So you will see but basically everything that happened to Cheryl did not happen in Riverdale. I'll stop rambling now. Sorry for any errors or typos
> 
> *Warning for this chapter would be excessive drinking*

Cheryl clutched the worn steering wheel of her newly purchased 2001 Ford Ranger. Her red, manicured nails dug into the old leather as she drove down the road, the yellow tinted headlights guiding her into the darkness. The engine stuttered and chugged along the highway, feeling like it could break down at any time. She hummed in amusement to herself, astounded that she finally had gotten the courage to flee her family and leave her dreadful life behind. She wanted to at least drive until the sun came up to put as much distance between herself and her home that she could. Home. Well it wasn’t really home anymore. She ran her finger over the dash, coating her skin with dust. She grimaced with disgust but what could she expect for an $1000 cash deal in the middle of the night? Chump change for her. She just needed it to get her as far as possible, get the most out of the old truck that she could. The man she bought it from was more than happy to get the beater off his hands. Wherever it stopped, she would stop, for now.

She coasted down the highway, idly turning the radio dial, hoping to find anything but static. No luck. She shut it back off, the silence in the cab more deafening to her. The redhead tapped her fingers on the wheel nervously, not wanting to be alone with her thoughts right now. There was nothing else she could do but think. Images of her beloved twin brother flashed in her mind. His red hair shining in the sun the last day she saw him alive. His hand had been warm when she held it, now cold and void of life. The tears burned on the edges of her eyes, threatening to spill down her cheeks. She imagined her brothers last moments, staring down the barrel of a gun in the hands of their father. The thought caused her to shiver and bite back a sob. She took one hand off the wheel to cover her mouth, not wanting her cries to echo in the old truck.

She inhaled deeply, calming her senses so she could focus on the road. The lanes blurry through her tears. She glanced at the old clock, the green numbers reading 4:07. She had left her home at midnight. Four hours seemed like a good start. She decided the next sign she saw for any form of civilization, she would stop at. 

She didn’t have to wait long. A few miles later her headlights illuminated an old sign with a picture of a bright blue river. “Welcome to Riverdale the Town with Pep” it read. She pulled off on the exit and followed the road into the small town. It looked charming enough, picturesque, kind of old fashioned. She immediately began looking for any sort of hotel she could stop in for the night. She drove for a few more moments, passing a small diner with a sign shining pink and red, reading “Pops Chock Lit Shoppe”. She smiled at the simplicity of the place. Her truck drove over train tracks, jarring her from her trance. 

The houses and buildings started to look more run down as she continued her journey. She desperately needed to find a place to stay, her eyelids getting heavy now. She spotted a red lit sign up ahead, the vacancy flashing at her like a beacon. She sighed in relief and steered her rickey truck into the parking lot. She cut the engine and opened the creaking door as she stepped out, her heels landing firmly on the pavement. She stretched her arms over her head, cracking her joints that had not moved out of the seated position in over four hours. 

She walked slowly towards the front office and opened the wooden door cautiously. The room was dimly lit, a thin layer of smoke taking up the small space. An old woman with stringy grey hair sat behind the desk, a cigarette hanging loosely from her mouth. Her eyes were cast down and Cheryl couldn’t tell if they were open or closed. The redhead cleared her throat, hoping to get the attention of the woman. Nothing. She cleared her throat a bit louder. The woman still did not stir.

“Excuse me?” Cheryl said as politely as she could, finally jarring the woman from her sedated state.

“Oh, hello! Welcome to Motel 9. How can I help you?” the lady said her rehearsed greeting.

Cheryl gave her a fake smile. “I saw your vacancy sign and I will need a room for at least a day, if that is possible.”

The lady pulled out a thick binder from her desk drawer and slammed it on the surface. She opened it and ran her finger along the pages, squinting her eyes as she read. “Yup. I do have a room. Number 47. 50 bucks a night.”

Cheryl pulled out her wallet, opening it discreetly to hide the amount of cash she had in there. She didn’t want to use her credit card. “Is cash ok?”

The old lady let out a raspy laugh. “That’s all anyone pays with here honey, no problem.”

Cheryl nodded, pulled out a 50, and laid it gently on the desk.

The older woman tucked it into a drawer and handed Cheryl a silver key. “Walk out this door and go left. Room isn’t hard to find. If you need more days than today, just come back and pay tomorrow night.”

“Thank you.” Cheryl mumbled as she headed back to the truck to grab her bags.

She reopened the truck and grabbed her two red, leather bags. Holding one in each hand as she walked towards her room. She found it easily, delicately placing one bag on the ground while she worked the key into the lock. She opened the door with a firm shove and walked in, locking the door behind her. She switched on the light which dimly lit the musty room. It was small, with a full bed, antenna TV, a small white mini fridge, and a dusty coffee machine. There was a door off to the side, leading to a small bathroom with a washed out green shower curtain.

Cheryl sighed heavily and threw the comforter off the bed, followed by the sheets. She opened her bag and pulled out some blankets she had shoved in. She laid on the squeaky mattress and cocooned herself in her soft sheets. Even though she was in an unknown place, even though not a single soul in this town knew who she was, and even though she was miles from anything familiar, she had never felt more safe. She closed her brown eyes and drifted off to sleep.

*****

The sound of loud voices woke Cheryl from her slumber. She opened her eyes, panicking slightly, forgetting where she was for a brief moment. She quickly grasped for her phone 4:00 PM. She had almost slept 12 hours, not stirring once. The loud arguing continued through the paper thin walls and the redhead got up to stretch. She smiled as her joints popped and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She looked rough. Her red hair was sticking up every which way, her makeup was smudged all over her face, and the whites of her eyes were bloodshot. There was no way she was going to be road ready tonight. She opted to shower, find some food, and pay the old woman for another night.

After a shower where the warm water only lasted two minutes, Cheryl picked out an outfit from her luggage. She settled on a white blouse decorated with images of cherries, red high waisted pants, and tall heels, anything to start feeling normal again. She painted her lips red and fluffed her hair with her hands, adding some last minute volume. She grabbed her purse and key in her hand and headed out.

She walked across the parking lot, heels clicking on the pavement. The redhead pushed upon the door to find the woman to pay for another night. Much like early this morning, the woman’s head was bent downward, a cigarette hanging from her lips.

“Ma’am?” Cheryl called out.

The lady shook her head, startled and sat up straight. “Oh hello there.”

Cheryl squinted her eyes suspiciously, briefly wondering how this whole building had not gone up in flames yet. “Yes...umm..I wanted to pay for another night.” the redhead stated, pulling another crisp 50 out of her wallet.

The lady gave her a large smile. “Oh wonderful! Names Nancy by the way, if you are gonna be stayin’ awhile, might as well know.”

“I’m Cheryl...and I won’t be staying long...hopefully just this last night until I am rested.” she said nervously. “By the way...do you know any good places to get food around here?”

Nancy tapped her cigarette on the ashtray in front of her, exhaling the smoke she had just inhaled. 

Cheryl watched her intently, eyeing her unique ashtray. A turtle, upside down on its shell, holding the tray up with its 4 little legs.

“Well..now what is that place called? They have the best burgers….” Nancy’s voice trailed off. “It’s down the road to the left.” she stated but pointed right. “The...ummm...The Whyte Wyrm, that’s it!” she snapped her finger, her eyes glazing over.

Cheryl pursed her lips at the odd name. “Oh..okay. Thank you. I will check it out.”

Nancy nodded her head, giving Cheryl a crooked smile. “Enjoy.”

Cheryl gave her a little wave and headed to her pick up, shaking her head at Nancy’s antics. The redhead got to her truck and it took a few times to crank over, causing her to feel distressed. “Great.” she mumbled as she finally got the engine started. It clunked out of the parking lot as she made a left onto the main road. She considered for a moment going back towards the restaurant she had seen last night, but figured the locals would know best.

She maneuvered the vehicle down the road, keeping her eyes peeled for the Whyte Wyrm. She didn’t have to look for long. After only a few moments on the road, a dilapidated building came into view. It had a green oning with a giant snake painted on it, its mouth open in a sinister hiss. Cheryl saw a hoard of motorcycles parked out front and suddenly felt very out of place.

She parked the truck and cut the engine, sitting for a moment staring at the building. She saw a group of people decked out in leather jackets enter the bar as she looked down at her outfit. Dressed perfectly but not for this occasion. Her hand hovered over the ignition, having a mental battle on if she should leave the parking lot and never come back. She took a deep breath in, calming herself. She may be at a strange place but she was still Cheryl Blossom and Cheryl Blossom could make any situation work in her favor.

She swung open the door before she could think twice, held her head high, and walked into the bar. She was immediately met with the smell of smoke, it hung over most of the room in a cloud. Her senses went into overload. The clink of beer mugs, the pop of a pool stick hitting the cue ball, deep laughs of men howling at the dumb jokes of their friends, and 80’s rock playing over the crackling speakers. Cheryl arched an eyebrow suspiciously, this did not look like a burger joint.

If she was here she may as well have a drink. She made her way over to the bar, keeping her head high but avoiding the gazes from the other bar patrons. She knew she stuck out like a sore thumb, but she did not want them to know she knew. She approached the bar and hopped up on an empty stool, luckily there was no one seated on either side of it.

She propped her elbows up on the bar and laid her head in her palms, taking a quick moment to herself.

“Are you okay?” a sweet yet raspy voice asked the redhead.

Cheryl lifted her head slowly to acknowledge the voice, her eyes still closed. “Yes..I ..” she opened her eyes and her voice got caught in her throat before she could finish her sentence. In all of Cheryl’s 24 years of life, she had barely ever been rendered speechless. The only other time had been when she found out that her father had murdered her brother, a cruel joke that left her shaking and unable to speak on the floor of her foyer. But this. This was a speechless she could get used to. Peering back at her from behind the bar was the most breathtaking girl Cheryl had ever laid eyes on. Long, pink hair, caramel skin, full pink lips, soft brown eyes, and long eyelashes that touched her cheeks when she blinked. Cheryl took a second to admire her outfit as well. Tight black jeans, and an olive green tank top, showing off her full chest perfectly. 

The other girl titled her head as she bit back a grin. “Are...you...okay?” she asked again.

That rasp. Cheryl felt her mouth go dry, frantically telling herself to respond to this beautiful stranger. “I...yes… I am fine..just tired.”

The pink haired girl’s eyes softened. “I understand, I barely got any sleep last night...but you don’t care about that. What can I get you to drink?” she asked happily.

Cheryl pursed her lips in thought, her eyes scanning the various bottles sitting on the shelves behind the tanned skin girl. “Your best white wine please.”

The girl let out the cutest giggle Cheryl had ever heard. “Umm...No one has ever asked for wine..to be honest I don’t think we have any..if we do it is probably hundreds of years old and covered in dust down in the basement.”

Cheryl tried to hide her disappointment. “Oh..okay...well..how about a Jack and Coke?” she quickly shot out a drink order. She had never had Jack but she knew when Jason snuck alcohol from their dad’s liquor cabinet it was always Jack.

“Coming right up.” The girl said happily. “What’s your name beautiful?” She asked as she grabbed the bottle.

Cheryl scoffed at the typical bar line. “It’s Cheryl….” her voice unenthused, having had high expectation for the bartender. “Yours?”

“It’s Toni.” she stated as she slid Cheryl’s drink across the bar. “I’ve never seen you here before..”

Cheryl placed the tiny red straw between her lips and took a tentative drink. She did her best to hide the surprise of the taste as she swallowed it down. “Just passing through.”

Toni nodded silently. “Cool...well we are pleased to have you.” she said and turned her back to grab some more glasses.

Cheryl spun the straw around her drink, watching Toni curiously. “Excuse me?”

Toni turned, acknowledging Cheryl’s question. “Yes?”

“May I have the food menu please?” Cheryl asked.

“Food menu?” Toni asked, confusion on her face.

Cheryl felt her face heat up with embarrassment. “I apologize... a woman I met referred me here...for a burger.”

“Fuckin’ Nancy.” Toni mumbled.

“You know her?” Cheryl asked, her interest peaked. 

“Yes, she’s ummm...unique.” She paused. We used to serve food here back in the day. When I say back in the day I mean like the 60’s. Pop’s down the road and the Wyrm used to be the places to go for burgers. It was like a friendly competition. Long story short, Pops out stood the test of time and well...the Wyrm turned into a biker bar.” Toni explained, holding her hands up to the ceiling.

“I see…” Cheryl said slowly, suddenly getting nervous that she was drinking on an empty stomach. She placed her hand on her middle, trying to ease the rumbling.

Toni noticed this and bit her lip in concern. “One sec, I’ll be right back. I think I have just the thing.”

Cheryl watched as the shorter girl dashed from behind the bar and disappeared into the crowd before the redhead could get a good look at her. She sipped her drink, finally getting used to the taste and quickly polished it off. 

Toni returned a short time later, a bag of pretzels in her tanned hands. Her eyes widened when she saw Cheryl’s empty glass. She tossed the redhead the snack. “I’ll get you a refill but eat these while I do.”

Cheryl grabbed the pretzels and opened the bag quickly, immediately popping one of the pretzels into her mouth. She couldn’t remember the last time she had eaten anything, the salty snack tasted like the best thing she had ever had. She chewed happily as Toni slid her a newly filled glass across the counter.

“How long you here for?” Toni asked as she wiped the bar top with a towel.

Cheryl sipped through her straw, pondering her answer. “Not long...hopefully I will be leaving tomorrow.” Cheryl swore she saw a hint of sadness in Toni’s brown eyes, which she quickly hid.

“Cool! And where are you headed if you don’t mind me asking?” The pink haired girl inquired, watching Cheryl curiously. 

Cheryl pursed her lips as she contemplated her answer. “I am going to keep driving until I hit the ocean.” 

Toni smiled wide at the answer. “I like that.”

“I’m serious.” Cheryl reiterated as she took her drink in her hand and lips to the glass, tilting it back and finishing it off. “Another please.”

Toni bit her lips hesitantly. “You sure?”

Cheryl rolled her eyes. “I’m a paying customer..another please.”

The shorter girl shrugged and began mixing another drink for the redhead. She slid it towards her, like she had the other two.

Cheryl took a large sip and hummed contently. “You are consistent. Each drink has tasted identical. Not too overpowering, the perfect balance I think.”

Toni smirked proudly. “I hope so, I have been working here since I was 16.”

“How old are you now...if you don’t mind?” Cheryl asked, the liquor making her a bit braver.

“24. I will be 25 in a few weeks actually.” Toni said as she grabbed some cash from another customer, still holding conversation with Cheryl.

“Same as me…” Cheryl mused.

A deep voice interrupted the girls small talk. “Toni, come help me downstairs, we had a delivery this afternoon, no one has unloaded the boxes yet.”

“Okay F.P.” Toni called back, giving Cheryl a sympathetic smile. “If you're gone before I get back, it was wonderful to meet you Cheryl.”

The redhead’s heart fluttered at the way her name sounded coming from Toni’s lips. She pondered her reply for a moment, she didn’t really have anything to lose. “I’ll wait for you.”

Toni’s smile grew. “Cool, my boy Fangs will take care of you while I am gone.” she pointed down to a dark haired boy, with tanned skin, slinging drinks of his own.

At the sound of his name, the boy turned and gave the girls a toothy grin. “You got it T.” he winked at them.

“Don’t let her drink too much, I’ve already made three.” Toni said warningly as she walked out from behind the bar.

Cheryl watched her walk away, taking a moment to finally admire her full figure. It did not disappoint. Curves in all the right places...and that ass...Cheryl felt her imagination run wild.

“Red. Refill?” the boy named Fangs asked.

Cheryl eyed the empty glass resting between her fingers. “Sure.”

“What were you drinking?” he asked kindly.

“Jack and Coke.” she responded simply, watching him immediately begin mixing her drink.

She tapped her nail on the bar top while she waited. The booze started to hit her all at once. She hadn’t drank in quite some time and she had forgotten the unsettling feeling it gave her at times. 

Fangs handed her a drink and tilted his head at her concerned. “You feeling ok?” he asked, looking like he wanted to take the drink back from her.

“All good….” she responded, trying her best to give him a genuine smile.

As soon as he went back to the other end of the bar, her mind went back to spinning. What was she doing? Letting her guard down like this in a strange place. Too drunk to even look across the room without feeling dizzy. If she couldn’t do that, how was she to get back to the motel? She sipped on her new drink, willing the alcohol to calm her nerves and not trigger them. She looked towards the entrance to the bar, all the sudden hyper aware that anyone could be looking for her. She felt her hand start to shake as she pictured her mom crashing through the door, her angry eyes searching for her daughter. 

She wouldn’t….she was probably over the moon that Cheryl was gone..but the alcohol was making her irrational. It felt like the room was getting smaller, like everyone was looking at her. Eyes boring through her skin, seeing all her secrets. She stood up abruptly from the bar stool, causing it to topple over behind her. She choked out a sob and began to teeter on her heels. She scanned the room, looking for a familiar face anywhere, waiting for something comforting to materialize. She tried her hardest to gain her bearings but quickly felt the world flip, her shoulder hitting the dirty, wooden floor of the bar.

“Cheryl?” a concerned voice called out.

Cheryl groaned lowly, her shoulder throbbing with pain. She felt a small pair of hands, gently lift her off the floor. Her vision was blurred but she could see pink hair. Familiar. Comforting.

“Fangs...help me please.” Toni pleaded.

Cheryl felt her body being lifted off the floor and closed her eyes, the alcohol completely taking her now. She knew she was somewhere else, the loud music of the bar was now muffled and distant. The last thing she remembered was being placed onto a soft surface, the smell of lavender and honeysuckle invading her senses, along with another flash of pink. It calmed her instantly as she drifted off to sleep.

*****

Cheryl jolted up with a start. The sudden rush of blood to her head, causing nausea to take over. Her temples throbbed with unpleasant pain, reminding her of how much she had to drink last night. Her heart hammered in her chest as she looked around the small room she was in. Sunlight was filtering in through dusty blinds causing her to squint. The walls of the room were covered in a tacky, bright pink floral wallpaper, making the redhead feel even more nauseous. She continued investigating the room, curious to find out where she was. She looked down at herself and realized she was still in her clothes from last night. Fuck. She can’t remember much after Toni left to go downstairs. She remembered the boy from the end of the bar. Dark hair, dark eyes, white smile. He was nice to her, he had asked her if she was okay and then...nothing.

Cheryl groaned and slowly dragged herself out of the comfortable bed. It was more comfortable than her bed from home and way more comfortable than the Motel 9. She placed her feet on the floor and gasped in surprise. Shag carpet. Yellow shag carpet. She shook her head in disbelief, where was she and who decorated? She made her way over to a small roll top desk in the corner of the room. She saw some wooden picture frames on top of the desk and held one in her hands, rubbing off a small layer of dust over the glass. She immediately recognized Toni. Pink hair shining in the sun, a carefree grin on her face as she leaned against a motorcycle outside of the Whyte Wyrm. She sighed in relief knowing that someone had been looking out for her.

She walked towards the bedroom door, hoping to sneak out before she had to face Toni. She wasn’t in the mood to be reminded of how drunk she got last night or hear any embarrassing stories that may have transpired. She opened the door as quietly as she could, exposing a small living area. Decorated just as questionably. There was a small kitchen set up in the corner with a green refrigerator, a small kitchen island with a brown countertop, and an old white stove. There was a small dining table that looked like the tables her grandmother used to set up for poker games, the kind that could fold up. There were too lawn chairs being used as the dining chairs.

Cheryl scratched her head in confusion at the strange space. She stepped further into the room and smelt a hint of smoke. It wasn’t fresh but smelled like it could be embedded into the room itself. The redhead spotted a worn leather couch, creases and tears littering the material. Curled up on the old couch was none other than the bartender from last night. Toni. Just as Cheryl had suspected. She was snoozing peacefully, covered by a large blue quilt. Her pink hair was standing up in every direction. Her lips were parted slightly, small breaths of air coming out.

Cheryl closed her eyes tightly, as she crept towards the door, taking careful steps to not awaken the smaller girl. The floor was creaky but she managed to make it to the door without any problems. She twisted the lock and flung the handle open, sunlight instantly filling the room. She gasped in surprise and stepped out onto a rusted metal staircase. She shut the door behind her and carefully descended the stairs. Her feet hit the concrete and she looked back up towards the place she had just left. Familiarity started to hit her, the bricks of the building were the same color as the dilapidated ones from last night. She quickly made her way to the front of the building and spotted her old truck in it’s parking spot. Toni lived in the Whyte Wyrm. No wonder they took her up there, it was the easiest option.

She shook her head at herself again at her reckless behavior and walked with heavy steps towards her truck. She hopped inside, exhaling shakily, still dealing with the pounding in her head. She shoved the key in the ignition and turned, waiting for the engine to spark to life. Nothing. She groaned and turned the key again, this time with more force. Still nothing. The redhead slammed her fist into the steering wheel and tried one more time. Still nothing. She placed both her hands on the wheel and laid her forehead on top of them. This had to be a joke.

A light thudding on the driver side window had the redhead looking towards the sound. A smiling, pink haired bartender was knocking lightly on the glass.

“Fuck.” Cheryl mumbled as she reached down for the lever to roll down the window. She turned it rapidly, lowering the barrier between them.

“Good morning.” Toni said casually.

“Morning…” Cheryl mumbled, avoiding eye contact.

“You okay?” she asked softly.

Cheryl leaned her head back on the steering wheel, feeling embarrassed to her those words from Toni’s mouth again. “My car won’t start.” she confessed.

“Mind if I?” Toni asked, gesturing towards the hood.

Cheryl nodded and popped the hood for the shorter girl.

Toni lifted it and stood on her tip toes peeking into the engine compartment. 

Cheryl stepped out and stood beside her. “See anything?”

Toni giggled and stood back flat on her feet. “No, I don’t know what I’m looking for.”

Cheryl wrinkled her eyebrows in confusion. “Then why did you act like you did?”

Toni laughed again. “I don’t know..to impress you or some shit.”

Cheryl squinted her eyes at the shorter girl. “Well, I’m not impressed. I’m annoyed, I am hungover, and now I am stuck here.”

Toni’s smile faltered slightly. “Let me call you a tow truck.” she stopped off to the side, pulling her cell phone out of the pocket of her sweatpants.

Cheryl watched her, feeling bad about the way she had just treated her. She knew the girl was only trying to help but she was riddled with self consciousness over the way she had acted the past twelve hours.

“He will be here in about 30 minutes...I told him to take it to my boy Sweet Pea’s shop down the road...hope that’s okay.” Toni explained, motioning down the street with her thumb.

Cheryl nodded with gratitude. “I appreciate it…”

Toni pursed her lips and ran a hand through her pink hair. “Well...if you want to wait inside you can..or I could give you a lift to the motel.”

“I can walk.” Cheryl said politely.

Toni raised her eyebrows and gawked at the heels the redhead was sporting. “Walk….?”

“Yes..I can walk.” Cheryl reiterated. 

“Okay...well...see ya around.” Toni shook her head and waved a goodbye as Cheryl hiked toward the main road.


	2. Tequila

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cheryl finds herself back at the bar, drowning her sorrows and trying to forget where she came from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello all. Its been two months since I updated this fic lol! Thanks for sticking around if you are still here lol. But I wanted to finish Vegas and then my mind got focused on One Shots, so here we are. If you forgot anything I would recommend going back to read Ch.1 or at least the explanation of the story. I hope y'all enjoy. I just read this myself so I am sorry for any errors or typos or anything like that. Lemme know what you think on here or on Twitter @Tonicheryltopaz. Trigger warnings noted below.
> 
> TW: Talk of attempted rape and sexual assault. Excessive drinking.

Cheryl let out a groan as she opened the door to her motel room. The walk from the Whyte Wyrm had been anything but pleasant. She internally scolded herself for not biting the bullet and taking Toni up on the offer of a ride. Her feet throbbed in her designer heels as she sat down on the creaky bed.

She sighed in relief the moment she sat down, her feet finally getting a break. She bent her leg at the knee to remove and examine one of her heels. “Fuck.” she mumbled as she saw all the tiny pieces of rock stuck in the bottom and all the scratches on the once smooth surface. She frowned and tossed the shoes to the corner of the room, not wanting to dwell on the matter any further.

She stripped herself of the rest of her clothes and stepped into the bathroom, switching on the light. She pulled back the shower curtain, it skidded across the rusty metal rod. She carefully lifted a foot into the cramped shower, turning the water all the way to the hottest temperature, knowing it wouldn’t matter anyway, but still wanting to try. She closed her eyes as the water cascaded over her body, hoping to wash off the memories or lack thereof from last night. This was supposed to be a fresh start. So far, it was more difficult than the redhead could’ve ever imagined.

Once the water turned to ice, Cheryl hopped out and wrapped herself in a scratchy towel that irritated her skin the moment it made contact with it. She frowned again and immediately grabbed some lotion out of her bag to soothe her skin. She rubbed it on her legs and her arms, combating the unpleasant sensation from the towels.

Cheryl pursed her lips as she looked around her motel. It hadn’t been long but she had already made a mess out of the small space. She quickly threw on a pair of black leggings, a red hoodie with red drawstrings, and a white pair of Vans. She tossed her wet hair over her shoulder and grabbed her wallet to pay Nancy for another week, not knowing the status of her truck.

The redhead stepped out into the sun, cursing under her breath for forgetting sunglasses. The sun rays shot straight to her hungover, causing her to wince as she walked with heavy feet towards the front office. Her hand hovered over the tarnished door knob, taking a deep inhale before twisting it.

She welcomed the smoke filled room as familiar now, something that didn’t quite bother her as much as she thought it would. Nancy was sitting in her swivel chair, her back straight, but her head bent backwards at the neck. She had a stack of Post-It notes balancing on her nose. Her head teetered back and forth as she struggled to keep them stabilized. Cheryl clutched her wallet in her hands, her nails digging into the leather as she observed the strange woman. She cleared her throat loudly. The woman continued her balancing act, not acknowledging the redhead’s presence.

“Nancy….” Cheryl mumbled.

The woman’s head shot up abruptly, the Post-It’s flying off her face and onto the wooden desk. 

“Oh! Sharon! It’s you.” 

“Cheryl.” she corrected through clenched teeth.

“That’s what I said.” Nancy insisted.

Cheryl rolled her eyes and opened her wallet to pull out seven, crisp fifty dollar bills. “I’d like to reserve another week...I’m hoping it’s not that long but I will pay in advance.” She placed the bills in front of Nancy.

The quirky lady laid them out in front of her, separating them so they were side by side, the bills lined up like skyscrapers on a city street. “Told ya you’d wanna stick around. This town does that to people.”

“I don’t want to stay. My truck broke down and I am not sure how long it is going to take to get fixed.”

Nancy continued toying with the money, now rolling them up into tubes and putting them between her fingers like little money cigarettes. “I give ya a month, you look like a 30 day girl.”

Cheryl shook her head. “Doubtful.” She turned on her heel to walk out the door .

“Oh wait, wait.” Nancy called to her. “Did you love the food at Pops? Told you it was the best.”

Cheryl felt the blood rush up to her face, quickly heating up with anger. “Well...I would have if you wouldn’t have told me to go to the Whyte Wyrm.”

Nancy scrunched her eyebrows together, casting Cheryl a doubtful look. “Now why would I send you to a biker bar? Madness….” 

Cheryl held her breath and thrust open the door, grateful to breathe fresh air again. She heard Nancy shouting her an array of goodbyes as she stomped back across the parking lot.

*****

The redhead began to walk towards her room but took a left towards the main road. As much as she wanted to crawl under the covers of the cheap motel bed, she knew she had to check on her truck. The only way to do that was to go to the Whyte Wyrm and find Toni.

Luckily, her change of shoes made the walk more bearable then it had that morning. She rolled her eyes to herself when the Whyte Wyrm came into view, looking a little less crowded then it had the day before. What day was it anyway? Sunday? Sunday sounded right. Her phone was clutched in her hand and she tapped it to see the time. 4:25. 

She pushed open the door to the bar and breathed a relieved sigh when she saw that it was mostly empty. She approached the bar and plopped on a stool, surprised that there was no one behind it. There was one man at the far end, his shoulders slouched, and a beer mug clutched between both hands, so there had to be someone there serving drinks.

“Red! Long time no see.” a male voice said from the entrance of the bar.

Cheryl spun around and saw the dark haired boy from last night, Fangs.

He walked over quickly and hopped behind the bar. “Sorry..I was having a smoke outside, I didn’t know you were here, I left ole’ Sparky in here with a beer and knew he’d be good for at least ten minutes.”

Cheryl shrugged and didn’t respond to the boy.

“Can I get you anything?” he asked happily.

“I came here to find Toni...to check on my truck.” she explained.

Fangs whistled under his breath as his eyes widened. “Your truck….yeah….I’ll let Toni tell you. Her shift starts at five, so you are stuck with yours truly for the next thirty minutes.”

“Perfect.” Cheryl falsely grinned.

“So….you sure I can’t get you anything?” he asked again.

“I uh...I don’t like what the Jack did last night…” the redhead admitted.

“Ah...I see. Well…” Fangs voice trailed off as he turned his back and scanned his index fingers over the glass bottles. He grabbed a shot glass, flipped it in his hand and slid it in front of the redhead. “Try this.” he announced as he poured liquid into the small glass.

Cheryl picked it up between her manicured fingers and examined the clear liquid. “Vodka?”

“Nope..try again.” the dark haired boy grinned. “Before you take it, hold out your hand.”

Cheryl squinted sheepishly and stuck her hand across the bar. She grimaced when Fangs applied some salt onto her skin.

“Now...grasp this.” he instructed, handing the redhead a slice of lime. “With your thumb and index finger. Breathe out. Lick the salt. Down the shot. Suck the lime.”

Cheryl scrunched her eyebrows but did as she was told. She licked the salt crystals off her hand, quickly downed the shot, and soothed the burn of the alcohol with the acid of the lime. It seared all the way down her throat but she liked the smoothness. It was pleasant and it was warm. “Another.” 

Fangs giggled and poured two shots. “One for me, one for you.”

The redhead grinned in approval and waited for Fangs to salt her hand again, and to present her with a lime. They downed the shots with a grimace and a smile.

“Well...well...well…” a sweet voice said from behind Cheryl.

She ignored the feeling of excitement in her chest, but she knew it was the pink haired bartender behind her. She quickly put on her best annoyed expression and turned to face her.

The pinkette was staring back with amused eyes and her arms crossed in front of her. She rose an eyebrow in question when she saw the empty shot glasses in front of the taller girl. “Starting early?”

“You know what they say T. Hair of the dog.” Fangs chipped in.

“I suppose…” Toni’s voice trailed off with worry. 

Cheryl watched the bartenders every move as she walked across the room and placed herself behind the bar. She looked a little tired, the redhead noted, the underside of her eyes slightly darkened.

“What brings you back this lovely evening?” Toni asked, a sincere, but weak smile on her lips.

“I wanted to touch base and see if you had heard anything about my truck?” the redhead asked.

Toni leaned against the bartop and gave the redhead a crooked smirk. “Well….it looks like you are stuck with us misfits another week. Your truck is old. It needs a part...something in the starting system..I dunno...but it’s old and the part has to be special ordered.”

Cheryl rolled her eyes and pressed into her temples with her fingertips. This was turning out to be a nightmare of its own. “Okay...and did he order it?”

Toni nodded in confirmation. “He did...like I said...probably about a week, but I will keep you posted.”

“Another shot Fangs.” Cheryl said with a raise of her finger.

“Another two, one for me, one for you boo.” he winked.

“Fangs...what have I said about drinking behind the bar...it’s not professional.” Toni lectured.

Cheryl watched the exchange between the two of them with amusement, as she brought the shot glass to her lips. It was her third shot in thirty five minutes and she was feeling it already.

“Oh, loosen up Toni. It’s all in good fun...right Red?” he asked playfully.

“Stop flirting with the customers' Fangs.” Toni grunted.

Cheryl waved a hand. “He’s doing no harm. It’s not like he has a chance anyway. Strictly girls here.” she said, surprising herself with her honesty. The alcohol really did have effects on her. She watched Toni’s expression as she uttered those words, and saw the reaction her unconscious was hoping for. Amusement. Intrigue. Excitement. All in a span of 1.5 seconds.

Toni giggled when Fangs hung his shoulders in faux defeat. “It’s okay...I am more into Mr. Man in the red tie over there that just walked in, definitely a traveller as well.”

Cheryl glanced over her shoulder to see a clean cut businessman looking around with a shocked expression, much like her yesterday. “I hope he knows what he is getting into.”

“Be right back guys.” Fangs said hopping over the bar in one swift motion.

Toni shook her head and brought her attention back to the redhead. “So….” she began.

“So…..” Cheryl pressed, arching an eyebrow at the pinkette.

“What else can you tell me about the elusive Cheryl?” Toni asked. “So far, I know your first name, that you are ‘just passing through’ and that you like girls, which I can relate to by the way.”

Cheryl held back a laugh at the way Toni tried to fit that into the conversation, making sure to hold eye contact across the bar when she said it. “You’re a lesbian too?”

The pinkette shook her head. “Bi...but I’m more into girls. I mean...have you seen women?” she joked.

Cheryl ran a finger idly over her empty shot glass. “Clearly I have.”

“Anyways...and I know that you own an old truck. So...what else can you tell me?” the bartender asked again.

“Pour me another shot and maybe I will think of something.” Cheryl challenged.

Toni bit her lip and poured the redhead a shot of Patron. “Now..if you thought what Fangs was giving you was good, try some of this.”

Cheryl took the glass and brought it to her lips tentatively.

“Just toss it back, don’t think.” Toni instructed.

The redhead closed her eyes and threw her head back, the liquid burning down her throat. She grabbed blindly for a lime, which Toni placed into her hand. She bit down with delight. “That was a lot smoother. Thank you.”

“Anytime.” Toni winked. "Still tequila..just top shelf."

Cheryl gazed at Toni from across the bar. It may have been the liquor but the redhead’s brown eyes were locked on the shorter girl. Her back was to her now but she allowed her gaze to travel up her body. Her jeans were hugging her just right, her shirt tight around her curves. Her pink hair was wavy and spreading across her back. It looked so soft.

“Strike out.” a deep voice announced, dragging Cheryl from her trance.

Fangs hopped back across the bar with a look of defeat. “A married business man...who isn’t into dudes.”

“I’m sorry pal.” Toni laughed, giving him a pat on the shoulder.

“Ah well….another shot?” he asked with puppy dog eyes.

“Just don’t let me see it.” Toni mumbled, walking to the other side of the bar to help the increasing number of guests.

“What’s her story?” Cheryl asked nonchalantly while Fangs poured them another shot.

“Who Toni?” he chuckled. “I don’t know. Same as most of us here. Born in this town. Stuck in this town. It’s hard to get out of here.”

“Why?” the redhead asked, tossing back her shot.

Fangs followed suit and slammed the glass back down on the bar. “I don’t know. That’s how it is around here. Maybe they’re afraid, maybe they’re too comfortable. Maybe they don’t believe there is life outside of here…”

Cheryl pouted her lips in thought. “And what’s it for you?”

Fangs rolled his eyes playfully. “I’m waiting for my husband to walk through those doors.”

The redhead shook her head. “I’m being serious.”

He shrugged. “I don’t want too leave.”

“And Toni?” she urged.

“You’ll have to ask her.” he smirked.

“Another shot.”

*****

Cheryl swayed on the bar stool, laughing out loud at Toni’s antics behind the bar. She danced to the music on the jukebox, she tried to do tricks with the bottles, winking at Cheryl every time she did. When the redhead laughed the first time she quickly tried to pass it off as a cough. It startled her. The sound. She hadn’t heard her laugh fall from her lips in so long that it was unknown, but not unwelcome. She let it fall freely after that.

Her phone sat on top of the bar and she tapped it once. 8 PM. It was early and her screen was already blurry. “Where’s the bathroom?” the redhead asked.

Toni pointed to the left side of the bar. “Right down that little hallway. You good?”

Cheryl hopped off the stool, her legs bending slightly at the knee. She held up her palm to Toni. “I’m good.” 

She stumbled towards the hallway, hoping that the pinkette hadn’t noticed her lack of coordination. The redhead thankfully made it to the bathroom and closed the door behind her. She stared at herself in the mirror, her reflection staring back at her. Her eyes were glossed over, but her makeup was still flawless. “Hold it together.” she told herself, gripping the sink with her nails. “Do not have another repeat of last night.” The redhead turned on her heel and thrusted the door open, running directly into the arms of Toni.

“Whoa..sorry. I just wanted to make sure you got here okay.” the pinkette explained.

Cheryl’s breath caught in her throat when she felt warm hands gently gripping her arms. Her eyes flickered upwards and she was face to face with the bartender. She inhaled, the same scent that hit her senses when she had woken up this morning. So sweet. So alluring. She closed her eyes to make it last longer. She could feel puffs of warm air bouncing off her skin as Toni exhaled. “Yes...Im okay.” the redhead whispered, her eyes focusing on pink lips a beat too long. She watched as they curled upward under her stare.

“Good.” she let go of Cheryl’s arms promptly and turned back towards the bar.

The redhead quickly composed herself and followed the other girl. 

She plopped herself back on her stool, grateful to be sitting again.

“Red..you crashing here again tonight?” Fangs asked cheekily.

Cheryl shook her head. “No...I will head out soon. I have a long walk.”

Toni frowned at her words. “No way. You are not walking back again, especially not in the dark. You can stay here if you want, or I can have someone give you a ride.”

“Fine. Then another shot please.” Cheryl said happily.

Fangs giggled with glee and poured another shot for the redhead.

She quickly downed it and regretted it the moment it was down her throat. It was getting bad. Like it did last night. She felt her control dwindling, her inhibitions floating out the window. She gripped the bar top with her fingertips and tried to breathe. She couldn’t do this, not again. She felt a warm hand brush over hers and looked up to see Toni peering back at her.

“Enough for tonight I think…” she said carefully.

Cheryl nodded and tried to bite back tears.  _ Don't think about anything bad.  _ She told herself. The redhead almost had herself calm when a smell invaded her senses. That cologne. She turned so fast she could’ve fallen off the stool. The man Fangs had been talking to earlier had walked by. That smell. It was  _ him _ . But it wasn’t really  _ him. _ The same dark hair, the prestigious clothes, and the cologne. Flashes of his sinister smirk flashed in her mind. His breath on her ear. His rough hands gripping her bicep. Her heart rate increased and the room began to fade again.  _ Its not him Cheryl, its not him.  _ She screamed at herself in her brain.

“Cheryl...you look like you’ve seen a ghost.” Toni said, reaching for her hand again.

Cheryl withdrew her hand quickly and entangled it into her own hair, gripping tightly, trying to ground herself. “I..I have to go.” she said abruptly.

“Whoa, hold on. Let me call someone to give you a ride.” Toni said hastily, pulling her cell phone from her pocket.

“No….no.. I have to get out of here.” Cheryl said, trying to stand up and wobbling towards the exit. 

“Fangs...help.” Toni said as she dashed from behind the bar. The pinkette reached for Cheryl’s arm gently and stopped her. “Let’s go upstairs…” she said quietly.

Fangs gently gripped Cheryl’s other arm to help assist Toni in getting the redhead upstairs.

When Cheryl felt Toni’s hand grip her she felt comfortable, safe. When Fangs grabbed her other arm, she snapped. She saw _him_ again. His piercing eyes, his stupid laugh, the way his rough hands steered her out of the room and up to the hotel room. “LET GO OF ME.” she shouted at the top of her lungs. “DON’T TOUCH ME.” she squeezed her eyes shut and blindly swatted in the direction of the rougher hand.

“Cheryl...I got you, its okay.” Toni whispered in her ear.

“TELL HIM TO LET GO.” she cried.

“Fangs, I got it...go back to work.” Toni said, steering Cheryl outside so she could get her upstairs.

Cheryl leaned into the shorter girl's body as she was led outside and up the stairs to the little apartment. She shook with fear as Toni tucked her into bed, tears streaming down her face. “I’m sorry…” the redhead mumbled as her head lolled drunkenly to the side.

“Shhh….you’re safe here.” the pinkette whispered.

“I’m sorry…” Cheryl mumbled as she drifted into a restless sleep.

*****

Cheryl’s head was screaming when she opened her eyes. It throbbed with pain worse than yesterday morning, and her stomach churned when she saw the horrible wallpaper again. The tequila was stagnant on her tongue and the familiar feeling of shame clawed at her insides.

She wanted to get out of this room as quickly as possible, again, not wanting to face the bartender. She turned over and went to step out of the bed, but stopped. Her foot hovered in the air, as to not step on the girl curled up on the floor by the bedside. Her mouth was hung open, a little snore coming out as she breathed. Her pink hair was tangled but still beautiful. Cheryl sighed and leaned down to nudge the girl awake with her hand.

“Mmmm….” Toni let out a sleepy sigh. “Ah...you’re awake.”

“I am.” Cheryl said simply.

Toni nodded, a frown of concern forming on her lips. She stood up and stretched her arms over her head. “Mind if I sit?” she asked, motioning to the corner of the bed.

“It’s your bed.” Cheryl croaked out, her throat suffering from the lack of hydration.

Toni sat carefully and ran a hand through her hair. “Cheryl...last night…”

“Won’t happen again…” the redhead cut her off.

The pinkette nodded. “It’s not about that...you can come here...you can drink...but…” she paused to search for the correct words. “You were...triggered by something...you were so scared…”

Cheryl felt tears threatening to spill from her eyes. “I...I...said it won’t happen again.”

“Do you want to talk about it?” the other girl whispered.

“I...no.” 

“I understand...and I don’t know what happened...but I have an idea...and maybe...I can relate more than you think.” Toni said softly.

Cheryl scrunched her eyebrows in thought. “His name was Nick St. Clair.” she grimaced as she said his name.

Toni scooted closer as Cheryl began to speak.

“He was...charming. Not my type obviously, but..I was hurting and he showed me kindness, he showed me attention. Attention that I didn’t want from him...but I don’t know Toni. All I did was dance with him…”

Toni reached for Cheryl’s hand cautiously and held it loosely.

“He gave me a drink. It was innocent enough. I didn’t think twice about it.” the redhead explained. “I finished it and knew something was wrong right away.”

Toni gulped and held Cheryl’s hand a bit tighter.

“It’s a blur after that. I remember being led out of the room. I remember an elevator. I remember him grabbing my arm to hold me steady. I remember his breath on my face while he tried to hold me up. His hands were rough and his cologne was nauseating.” Cheryl took a deep breath. “I remember my back hitting the bed...him hovering over me...that stupid tie hanging down over my face…”

“Cheryl…” Toni choked out.

She held up her hand, not wanting to cry. “Nothing...happened. My friends came and beat the ever living shit out of him before it could go ‘there’..but the memories are still there you know? That man last night...he wore the same scent...he dressed like money, and when Fangs grabbed my arm I lost it…I’m weak and I’m sorry for embarrassing you.” the redhead sniffled.

“Cheryl….” Toni whispered, scooting a bit closer again. “You aren’t weak. That boy is weak. That boy is sick. You are strong. You are strong for telling me your story, and god...you did nothing wrong.”

The redhead's shoulders slumped as she listened to Toni’s words. “Sometimes it feels like I did…” Her mother's words echoed in her head.  _ She probably was asking for it. Nothing really “happened” to her. _

“I promise you...no one deserves that Cheryl..” 

She shrugged and hung her head, but felt relieved that she had said the words out loud. She had never fully told anyone her story. A weight was lifted, but the shame of last night was still heavy on her mind. 

“I still see that you are upset.” Toni said lightly. “It’s okay...last night...things happen..but we are here now…”

Cheryl nodded. “You’re right...thank you Toni.”

“Everyone’s story is different so I won’t give you some speech about how I know what you are feeling..but I’ve been there too...the fear doesn’t go away but we get stronger every day..” Toni whispered.

“You can talk to me too…” Cheryl’s voice drifted.

“I used to hate living here.” Toni began, jumping right in. “Above the Wyrm..” she took a deep breath. “I was seeing a guy...it wasn’t serious but we were exclusive. He had some bad habits, he was into some things I didn’t want to be a part of so...I broke things off. Simple enough.”

Cheryl nodded as Toni continued.

“He knocked on my door one night and I didn’t want to let him in, so I ignored him. My bike was outside so he knew I was in here. He kicked my door in and came for me. He held me down and I tried to fight back but he was so strong…”

The redhead whimpered at her words.

“I fought tooth and nail..so much so that my boss F.P. heard some commotion and came up to my apartment and threw him off before anything could ‘happen’...he also beat the ever living shit out of him..so much so that I have never seen the guy again…” Toni whispered, losing herself in thought.

“How do you cope with it? How do you get over it?” Cheryl pleaded for answers.

“I’ll let you know when I figure it out…” Toni admitted. “Some days are better than others, right?”

“Right….” 

“Everyone’s experience is their own Cheryl...things happened to us...they impact us...fuck anyone who says that we can’t feel how we need to feel..” Toni said, with a brush of her thumb to the top of the redhead’s hand.

Cheryl nodded in agreement, suddenly feeling more empowered than she had in awhile. Talking. It seemed to help.

“Also...I don’t want to tell you how to live your life…” Toni began. “I know drinking..it can help numb the pain, it can help block our feelings, but it also can magnify everything. It can make you feel out of control, and it can make you think about things long locked away in the corners of your mind.”

“I know...thank you for looking out for me. If it wasn’t for you...who knows where I would be these past two nights.” Cheryl said.

“I am glad I could help.” Toni smiled.

“Can you do me one more favor?” Cheryl asked sheepishly.

“Of course.”

“Walk me home?” the redhead whispered, casting her eyes down again.

“I would love to.”

  
  
  
  



	3. Milkshakes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toni gives Cheryl a Riverdale history lesson as she recovers from her bender and Cheryl finally eats.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy cow! I haven't updated this fic in like 5 months LMAO. The pandemic has got me fuckeddd up lol. I had covid, got thrown back into classes, lost someone close to me, along with many other things but I hope I am back. A few things I feel you must know before reading this. This is 10000000% a filler chapter. I have had it just sitting here for months because I have big big things in the next chapters but I didn't know how to separate it all. So this is pure filler, just to help me ease back into the process, so be gentle lol. And keep in mind all the things to come, so in other words, this is probably going to be a let down for a 5 month wait lol but I need to start somewhere. Thanks if anyone is still reading lol. If its been awhile I suggest a refresher of the other 2 chapters lol. Anyways enough of my ramble. Sorry for any errors.

The two girls walked side by side down the road back to the motel. A comfortable silence hung between them, both lost in their own thoughts.

Toni broke the quiet first. “Have you eaten?”

Cheryl felt the burning in her stomach that had been there for the past two days, and the realization hit her all at once. The only thing she had eaten since she had arrived were those stale pretzels that Toni had got from the vending machine. She tentatively ran a hand over her growling stomach. “No…” she responded sheepishly. “Well technically yes...the pretzels.”

Toni skidded to a stop, her mouth hung open. “Cheryl….okay I am taking you to Pop’s for breakfast, no arguments.”

Cheryl sighed heavily. “Please..I have been enough trouble already.”

“Nonsense.” the pinkette argued. “Have you been on a two day bender? Yes...but I can’t let you visit Riverdale without eating Pop’s. Consider it a favor to me…” she pleaded, softening her eyes and blinking at Cheryl.

The redhead looked into brown eyes and nodded. “Fine...One meal, but let me freshen up once we get to the motel.”

Toni hopped up with excitement. “Great!”

Cheryl shook her head with a chuckle as they continued walking towards the roadside motel.

They approached the building and Cheryl headed in the direction of her room. “I can meet you in the front office if you want.” she offered.

Toni nodded and walked the other direction. “I can see what Nancy is up to.”

Cheryl unlocked her room and stepped inside. She still had not spent the night there, and she was secretly grateful for that. Even though she hardly knew Toni, she felt so safe with her. The mysterious pink haired bartender was still a stranger to her. In two days though, the girl had taken better care of Cheryl then anyone had her whole life. It felt peculiar but peaceful at the same time. She had an urge to take care of Toni too. She didn’t know much about the girl, but she knew she wanted to spend as much time with her as possible. The first night Cheryl had just chalked it up to small town manners..but...now..Toni was still here. Toni was waiting for her to get breakfast, Toni wanted to make sure she ate. Either the girl was a complete psycho, or...she genuinely cared. In Cheryl's experience, the psycho option was more plausible, although she was desperately hoping for the latter. 

The redhead quickly changed her clothes, washed her face, and brushed her teeth. She felt fresh and ready for another day in the quaint town.

Cheryl went back outside and approached the front office. She swung open the door and was met with the chatter from Toni and Nancy. They looked to be going back and forth. Both of the women had cigarettes between their fingers, and Toni was leaned forward slightly, her other hand moving animatedly. She looked like she was trying to explain something to Nancy, but the older woman wasn’t getting it.

“Ask Carol.” Nancy said quickly when she saw the redhead walk in.

“It’s Cheryl….” the redhead said through gritted teeth.

“Fine.” Toni agreed and leaned back in her chair as she took a drag from the cigarette, “Cheryl...Nancy is trying to tell me that at the end of Titanic...Rose is in the right for throwing that diamond necklace into the water….”

Cheryl suppressed a laugh. “And what do you think?”

Toni exhaled smoke towards the ceiling. “It makes no sense. Hear me out. Rose’s ex fiance gave her that necklace. He was a total prick. It had no connection to Jack, except for the fact that he saw her naked wearing it. Then...that research man spent his whole career searching the ocean for this necklace. He flies Rose out, listens to her story, puts her up in a nice room, and this lady has the audacity to toss it into the ocean. Like...give it to the researcher and then go be with Jack...I don’t get it.”

“I think it’s more of a figurative thing.” Cheryl chimed in.

“That’s what I said.” Nancy groaned.

Toni rolled her eyes and put out her cigarette. “Nancy...you didn’t say that, you just wanted to say opposite of whatever I said.”

The older lady chuckled and lit up another cigarette. “Whatever Topaz, have fun on your breakfast date.”

“It’s not a date.” the pinkette argued. “Later Nancy.” 

Cheryl watched as Toni reached her hand across the desk and maneuvered through a series of intricate hand slaps, fist bumps, and finger touches with Nancy like some sort of secret handshake. The redhead squinted her eyes and followed Toni out the door when she was through.

“You and Nancy seem pretty close.” Cheryl pried as they began walking down the road again. She wasn’t being nosy...she just wanted to learn more about Toni.

Toni giggled and smiled down at the ground as she walked. “Kinda...she’s kind of like...ummmm...a grandma for the whole Southside if that makes sense.”

Cheryl pursed her lips in thought. “Kinda…”

“I don’t want to bore you with a history of Nancy.” Toni sighed.

“Well...I’m here aren’t I? I would love to hear it.” Cheryl said, surprising herself.

“Okay.” the pinkette’s face lit up. “I guess I will start with some background. There used to be a gang here. The Southside Serpents. That is a whole lesson of itself, but they had been around this area forever.” she began. “They were in their prime in the 1950’s and 1960’s. The gang was the biggest it had ever been, everything on the Southside was controlled by them. Nothing in this area happened without the Serpents having a hand in it, good or bad.” Toni tucked a lock of pink hair behind her ear as she spoke. “Anyway..Nancy was in the inner circle. She ran with the higher ups in the gang, my grandfather being one of them.” Toni said proudly.

“Your grandfather?” Cheryl asked, already enthralled by the story.

Toni nodded. “Mmhmm, my family had deep roots in the Serpents.“

Cheryl made a mental note of the way Toni’s shoulders straightened and her smile grew when she mentioned her grandfather.

“Anyways...Nancy’s father owned the motel, so she literally grew up there and she hasn’t left, in her whole life I honestly don’t think she has lived anywhere else.” Toni explained. “I don’t know anything about Nancy’s mom, but I know Nancy worked there since she could walk. She stayed in the front office with her dad and worked there when she got a little older.”

Cheryl listened intently, surprised at the way Toni’s voice relaxed her. It was a nice change of pace to focus on listening, rather than letting her own thoughts take over, and so far, Toni was an excellent storyteller.

“Well one day the Serpents approached Nancy’s dad. Made him an offer. An offer of protection, a monetary offer too I am sure. They also offered him a place in the gang….if he wanted it.” the shorter girl continued. “He took it without much hesitation and thus began Nancy’s slow but steady climb into the ranks of the Serpents.” Toni said, a hint of dramatics added to her voice.

Cheryl covered her mouth to stop a giggle and saw Toni suppressing one in response to hers.

“Nancy became a valuable member of the Serpents by the time she was 16. She had that heir of innocence to her so it was easy for her to talk her way out of situations. Also, she had an edge, see, there was a room that was not on the blueprint of the motel, it was used to hide Serpents who were in trouble.” Toni explained.

“What kind of trouble?” the redhead asked curiously.

“Well...the Serpents weren’t the only gang. So you had typical gang rivalries, threats to lives, avoiding arrest….things of that nature.” the pinkette explained nonchalantly.

Cheryl nodded and hopped over the train tracks they had just approached.

“Nancy kept track of it all. She knew where to hide them, how long to hide them, who could be trusted, who could not be trusted. She caught the eye of my grandfather too. Her wit, her charisma, her attitude, it was hard not to find Nancy intriguing. I heard that from all the older Serpents when I was growing up. She was a pistol.”

Cheryl wrinkled her nose at the way Toni was speaking. “You keep talking about her in the past tense…”

Toni bit her lip before she spoke again. “I don’t mean too. It’s just that...once Nancy was in the gang she was  _ IN  _ the gang. Every group of people has their bad apples...and unfortunately they got to Nancy. She got heavy into drugs and when her father passed when she was 21...that only made her spiral more.”

Cheryl felt her heart clench. She knew the damage of drugs. Drugs had torn her own life to shreds. Drugs had ripped through her imperfect family, causing pain that the redhead never knew was humanly possible. She clenched her teeth and shook her head to stop herself from getting lost in her own head.

“I don’t know all the ins and outs. I just know that her drug use is what broke her and my grandfather up. He wouldn’t kick her out of the gang and that caused a lot of tensions too. It was a rough road for her...she got clean eventually and continued working at the motel for the Serpents for a bit but….” Toni paused. “Although she was sober, it was hard for her to get her footing back in the gang. She essentially stepped down and saw herself out when she was about 25. She still loved the gang and the gang still loved her, so she offered her services in a different way.” Toni paused again for dramatic effect. “A lot of the Serpents started having kids and she kind of became the babysitter for all of them. Kind of charming actually.”

Cheryl let out another laugh. “Wait...people actually left their kids with Nancy?”

Toni smirked and gave Cheryl a small nudge to the shoulder. “She was actually great at it. That quirky humor, kids found it hilarious. She did that for years...I mean she watched me and my friends too. She is and was a huge part of all of our lives. She kept most of us clean too, none of my friends that were watched by Nancy got into hard drugs. Made sure we weren’t getting into trouble…..things like that.”

Cheryl couldn’t help but notice the way that Toni did not mention her parents once. There was a sadness in her voice too when she was reminiscing. A sadness that was familiar to Cheryl, but someone who had not felt that sadness may not have noticed it.

“Anyways...long story short...I have known Nancy forever and even though we like to argue with each other sometimes, I don’t know what the Southside would be without her.” Toni sighed.

Cheryl reached over and gave Toni’s arm a soft squeeze. “Thank you for telling me that Toni. It’s refreshing to have some insight into this place that has been my ‘home’ for the last couple days.”

“Of course.” Toni smiled in thanks. “And now you get to add this to your ever growing Riverdale history.” the shorter girl stated as she raised her hand and pointed to the building in front of the pair.

Cheryl grinned when she saw the picturesque diner a few feet away. It was just as she pictured it in her head, even though she had never seen it before. It looked busy from the outside. Each booth that lined the windows was filled, and she ran a hand over her stomach again to calm the ever growing gnawing sensation.

“Don’t worry. “ Toni reassured. “We are going to eat some much food you won’t even be able to walk out of here.”

Cheryl smirked at the shorter girl's excitement and followed her into the building.

Luckily, there were some empty tables and they were seated promptly. Cheryl clutched the greasy menu between her polished fingers and scanned the assortment of choices. Her eyes darted from the Breakfast section, to Lunch, and to Dinner, not even knowing where to begin.

Before she could dwell further, a pair of hands gently pushed the menu away from her worried face.

“Do you trust me to order for you?” Toni asked mischievously.

Cheryl bit her lip with nerves but nodded as she laid the menu down flat.

“Good.” 

The waitress came to the table, gave the duo a large smile, and pulled a notepad out from her yellow apron. “What can I get you ladies this morning?”

Toni’s eyes lit up with excitement as she leaned forward slightly. “Well...we will take 2 milkshakes. One strawberry, one chocolate, but can we have extra glasses so we can split both of those?”

“Of course.” the waitress said as she scribbled on the paper.

“Great! We will also have a tall stack of chocolate chip pancakes, and actually..how about throw two waffles on the side too.” Toni continued.

Cheryl sat back, wondering what this girl had up her sleeve.

“Lastly, we will take two cheeseburgers, with everything on them. One with a side of fries, and one with a side of onion rings. Can we also have an extra plate with that, so we can split the fries and onion rings?” Toni asked sweetly.

“No problem dear.” the waitress said with a pleasant smile. “I will go get that started for you. The milkshakes will be out shortly to start.”

“Thank you.” Cheryl called as the woman walked towards the counter to place their order.

Toni situated herself on her chair and looked at the redhead with gleaming eyes. 

“That was a lot of food Toni.” Cheryl chuckled.

“I guarantee you, we will have no leftovers. Me and my friends come here with hangovers all the time and we eat every crumb. And….you kind of have a two day hangover, plus it’s your first time here...you’ll see.” Toni said with a wink.

Cheryl averted her eyes down quickly, feeling her face heat up after Toni had winked at her.  _ Pull it together.  _ The redhead had noticed Toni’s appeal the second she had seen her behind the bar, but letting the pinkette have an effect on her, well that is something Cheryl could not let the other girl know. She was probably just being nice anyway. A wink meant nothing. It shouldn’t mean anything anyway. Cheryl was a stranger. A visitor to Toni’s world, no reason to think too deeply into something so innocent.

“You good Cheryl?” Toni chuckled as she nudged a pale hand with her index finger. “You zoned out for a second.”

“Sorry.” Cheryl mumbled. “Just hungry I guess…”

Toni pursed her lips, not satisfied with the redhead’s answer, but letting it slide.

“Two milkshakes.” A cheery voice announced.

The milkshakes were placed between the two girls and Toni hastily got to separating them in the frosted glasses.

“One chocolate.” Toni grinned, sliding one glass across the table.

Cheryl let it land between her two hands and pinched the straw between her thumb and index finger as she took a small sip. The cold liquid felt soothing of her throat from the burning of the alcohol the past couple nights. She closed her eyes as she took in another large sip.

“Andddd one strawberry.” Toni announced as she slid another glass across the table to join the one nestled between Cheryl’s hands.

Cheryl giggled as she held the two glasses between her hands.

“Watch this.” Toni announced as she took a straw from each milkshake and took a sip at the same time.

Cheryl giggled and copied her antics, letting the flavors combine in her mouth and squinting her eyes shut at the coldness and sweetness of the drinks.

The waitress returned shortly after with the pancakes and the burgers and both girls dug in without hesitation.

The pancakes and waffles were gone in a flash and Cheryl leaned back in her chair as she eyed the burger.

“I can’t do it Toni.” she groaned.

The pinkette bit back a laugh. “Just one bite. You have to try this burger. I promise you...you've never had anything like it.”

Cheryl picked it up and brought it slowly towards her mouth. She took one bite, closed her eyes in pleasure and quickly took another.

“Told you.” Toni smirked.

*****

Cheryl walked out of the diner as full as she had ever felt in her whole life. Her pants felt tight, her head was spinning from the overload of carbs, she could already feel the heartburn brewing, but even with all that she still felt content. She had a full stomach and she had amazing company. She had someone that just existed in her presence. Someone who didn’t demand anything from her. Someone who wasn’t breathing down her neck, someone who probably would still be cheerful even if Cheryl didn’t say a word back to her. 

The red glanced sideways at the blissful girl walking slowly by her side. She looked just as full as Cheryl, but she still had a small grin on her face. She was walking in pace with the redhead but was peering dreamily across the street at an old gas station, looking like she wanted to say something.

“What?” Cheryl asked simply, wanting to draw it out of her. It hadn’t been long, but the redhead was quickly picking up on Toni’s nonverbals.

Toni shook her head and shrugged. “It’s nothing, just random thoughts pop into my head sometimes...nothing worth anything really.”

“I’d like to know.” the redhead pressed, still starving for normal conversation that wasn't focused on her.

Toni took a breath in. “Sometimes I just see a place, or smell a scent, or see a sunrise, or taste something I haven’t in years, and It takes me back. Like a time machine.” she explained and then pointed. “That gas station over there..that rickety wooden bench right next to the entrance, I haven’t really  _ seen _ it in a long time.” Toni explained.

Cheryl scrunched her eyebrows, trying to understand what the shorter girl was saying.

Toni continued. “What I mean is..I knew it was there...but I just haven’t been down this way in awhile and seeing that bench...it takes me back.”

“Back to what?” the redhead asked, still confused.

“A memory I guess.” the pinkette mused. “It’s funny. . I used to sit on that bench with my friends all the time. Literally, Friday nights we would wait for a nice adult to walk by, and ask them to buy us a 12 pack. We usually only had ten dollars...but... it was enough.”

Cheryl watched Toni’s expression change as she spoke.

“Now...I’m the adult and kids ask me to go into the gas station for them. Mischief in their eyes, smirks on their lips. And the weird part is...I don’t know when we switched places.”

Cheryl nodded as she listened, the reality of her own situation weighing heavy on her mind. 

“And I used to dream of leaving here...dream of it.” Toni sighed. “But I haven’t tried..and I’m still here. You can keep telling yourself ‘someday’ all you want….” she paused and shook her head quickly to stop herself. “Sorry..I don’t know why I am telling you all this, I just….it’s nice to have someone who doesn’t know everything about you to talk too….small towns ya know? And...it seems..maybe you left somewhere too..”

Cheryl gulped and reached out her hand to comfort the shorter girl but quickly withdrew it before it made contact. 

Toni cleared her throat and slowed down her steps "Well this is your stop.” she announced as they approached the motel again.

Cheryl felt her heart drop slightly, not in the mood to part from the girl yet, it felt like there was still so much more to say. “Yeah..I guess it is.”

Toni rocked back and forth on her feet, looking at the ground before she spoke. “Ya know...if you were wanting to come by the bar tonight….remember I’m off.”

“Oh.” Cheryl responded, the disappointment clear, she had already forgotten that fact, so wrapped up in every word Toni had spoken thus far. “Well...I will probably hang around here then, or bother your friend Fangs for a few drinks.”

The pinkette bit her lip in thought. “Or..you could come over if you want.” she blurted out. “Maybe we could watch a movie or something. We could have some dinner if you are even remotely hungry after all of that.”

Cheryl placed a hand to her stomach and laughed. “I don’t know about the dinner part but a movie doesn’t sound too bad.”


	4. White Wine

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, or whoever is still sticking around for this fic. Sorry for the delay (again), I am a busy bee and I don't want to be lol. But barely any time to write anything that isn't a one shot. I have to use all my brain power for this fic. That being said, I hope you all enjoy it and such. Talk to me on Twitter if you want (tonicheryltopaz).
> 
> Song at the end is Tennessee Whiskey by Chris Stapleton, and I tell you I would give anything to dance with Toni Topaz to that lol.
> 
> Also...a huge shoutout to the sensational Andy (chonisational on twitter) for reading this for me. I have been sending her bits and pieces of this for awhile and finally got a large chunk done and she stuck around for it lol. She is the best hype woman I could ask for and a great friend. So thank you Andy for reading and correcting my errors *3 hands* ,love you .
> 
> Enjoy :)

Cheryl ascended the stairs to Toni’s now familiar apartment above the Whyte Wyrm. She never had gone up the stairs sober. Not a proud accomplishment, but an interesting observation. She also hadn’t gone one night without being attached to one of the bar stools of the dilapidated biker bar. It had only been two nights, but time was stagnant here. The past two days had felt like years. If anyone who wasn’t Cheryl had experienced days like the past two, they may have called it rock bottom. To the redhead, they were two of the best days she had ever had. Any day closer to freedom was a good day. Any day away from her wretched mother was a good day. Cheryl made it to the top of the stairs and took a breath. It was also no surprise to Cheryl another reason why these days were even remotely considered “good.” Toni. If it weren’t for Toni then these days would fall under some of her worst. The shame she felt each morning she woke up after being a drunk mess was quickly erased when she saw Toni. 

The redhead raised her fist and knocked twice on the flimsy door. She teetered back and forth on her feet while she waited for it to open. Heavy footsteps could be heard before the door was swung open to reveal the shorter girl in a black sports bra, tight black shorts, and her hair up in a messy ponytail. Cheryl blinked in surprise at her appearance and tried not to let her eyes linger on the belly button ring that was sparkling against a toned stomach.

“I am so sorry.” Toni exclaimed, breaking Cheryl from her state of shock. “I was in the middle of a work out, I didn’t notice the time. Come on in, get comfortable, I will go get changed.”

The redhead opened her mouth to speak, but couldn’t quite get the words out. Cheryls typical eloquent speech was seeming to fall short when it came to be in the presence of a certain bartender. “Oh..uh...thank you.” she managed to get out as she stepped into the small apartment. 

Toni closed the door behind them and went to her room to get changed. “I hope you don’t mind, I thought we could just eat light tonight, ya know, after that huge breakfast today.” the pinkette suggested from her room.

Cheryl plopped down on the couch, her mind still abuzz.  _ She’s just a girl Cheryl. Relax. _ “Yeah...that's fine. I don’t know how you even managed a workout” the redhead responded.

“”When I say I was in the middle of a workout..I mean I just got my clothes on and stared at the TV. Toni said reappearing from her room, now downing black sweatpants, and a red hoodie. “Oh! And before I forget..I got something for you.”

Cheryl watched as the pinkette made her way over to the refrigerator. She opened the door and pulled out a bottle of white wine.

“You don’t have to drink tonight, but I know you were wanting wine. I don’t know much about it.” Toni admitted as she squinted at the label on the bottle. “But I went to the liquor store and asked for the best bottle of white and this is what they gave me.”

Cheryl felt her heart clench in her chest. Toni had remembered. Toni had listened to her. She went out of her way  _ again  _ to make the redhead feel comfortable. “Thank you Toni...I would love a glass.”

Toni grinned and grabbed wine glasses out of her cabinets. She twisted the cap off the bottle and poured Cheryl a hardy glass, filling her own glass up with water.

“Here you go.” the pinkette said as she placed the glass delicately in Cheryl’s hand.

“Thank you” Cheryl smiled as she swirled the wine in her hand, watching it coat the sides of the glass.

The sight was comforting to her in a way. The liquid moving in circles, the aroma lifting to her nose. It was familiar to her. Her wrist did the motion from muscle memory. She had been sipping wine since she was young. Appearing mature and adult in front of her parents business partners, and trying to look sophisticated at high school parities. It was second nature and when she lifted that glass to her lips, nothing had ever tasted so good.

Cheryl glanced to the side and watched as Toni mirrored her movements. Some of the water sloshed over the side of the glass and the redhead held back a giggle.

Toni smirked when she discovered Cheryl was watching her. “I ummm… haven’t quite mastered the art yet.” she laughed as she took a sip of water.

Cheryl shook her head. “My parents had me doing the wrist movement with my baby bottle, trust me, you aren’t missing out on anything,”

The pinkette smiled and took another small sip. 

Cheryl eyed the glass. “It’s on the sweeter side but it’s very good, thank you for getting it for me.”

The girls sat comfortably as the TV droned on in the background. Cheryl heard Toni giggle every so often at whatever was on screen, but the redhead could not focus. She found herself subtly looking at Toni out of the corner of her eye, and it was beginning to make her anxious.

It wasn't a bad anxious. It was more of an excited anxious. It was a butterflies in the stomach anxious. Cheryl could not even remember the last time she had felt this way about a girl. Having pushed these feelings down so far that they were clawing their way up at an accelerated pace. She took a deep sip of wine, hoping to “wash” the feelings down, but the more she heard Toni giggle, the more she knew even the wine wouldn’t stop the way she was feeling.

“Cheryl?” a sweet voice said.

The redhead was brought back to reality. “Yes?”

“Do you want me to change the channel or put in a movie or something?” Toni asked with a smile.

Cheryl could’ve melted into the couch with that smile. The redhead knew being away from her mother would have her feeling free, but she thought it would take her years to even be able to breathe again without that tight feeling in her chest. One smile from Toni and she felt that knot in her chest loosen too quickly that she was losing her breath for a different reason.

“Umm..a movie is fine.” the redhead managed.

Toni nodded and placed her glass on the rickey coffee table as she got up to put a movie in. “I only have a VCR if you can believe that.”

Cheryl could only reply with a smile.

“But it's all part of the charm I think.” the pinkette said as she gestured around her small apartment.

“I would have to agree.” Cheryl replied.

“There we go.” Toni said as she pressed play and hopped back on the couch.

Cheryl got comfortable and held her wine tightly in her hand, trying her best to focus on the screen. She felt Toni adjusting on the other end of the couch and turned to see what she was doing. The smaller girl was leaning forward and rummaging around in a small wooden box on the coffee table.

“Do you mind if I?” Toni asked as she held up a joint in Cheryl’s direction.

The redhead shook her head. “No...go for it.”

Toni leaned back into the couch, lit the joint and brought it to her lips.

Cheryl gulped as she watched Toni’s plump lips enclose on the joint, she felt her palms start to sweat as she watched the pinkette inhale deeply, and exhale the smoke out into the room. The redhead wasn’t one to smoke anything, usually finding it completely off putting, but…. Toni was making this look like the sexiest thing on the planet.

“You want a hit?” Toni asked with an extended arm, noticing the redhead watching her.

Cheryl blushed and waved her hand. “Oh no, I’m good right now, I am going to get a refill”

Toni gave her a lazy smile and took another hit, blowing the smoke towards the ceiling. She finished the joint and grinned as she put both hands behind her head. “So…” she broke the silence as she turned to look at Cheryl in the small kitchen. “Almost three days in Riverdale…what do you think so far?”

The redhead gave an amused smirk as she made her way back to the couch. “Well...the food was good, the drinks are good, and the company is….” she looked at Toni for a beat. “Pleasant.” she settled on.

“It’s an acquired taste….” Toni’s voice veered off. “I’m just interested in what a beautiful girl like you thinks of a dingy town like this, you’re so mysterious compared to all the people here.”

Cheryl’s heart skipped a beat at the word beautiful. Not like she hadn’t heard it before...people were always throwing that adjective at her...people that didn’t matter though. Men that wanted her for one thing mostly.., or her mother would use it sometimes..but more of ‘for a beautiful girl you sure are extremely witless.’ When Toni said it, it made her warm. “Ummm...what do you want to know?”

“I don’t know.” Toni admitted. “It’s kinda like you just fell out of the sky.”

“That’s the point…” Cheryl stated with a smirk.

“Lucky for me.” Toni joked.

The redhead let out a nervous laugh. Was Toni flirting with her? No...she couldn’t be but...somehow they were slightly closer on the worn couch and Cheryl didn’t remember moving. She didn’t remember Toni moving either, but yet here they were, slightly closer.

“You tell me more about you.” Cheryl urged, always deflecting. 

‘Well...you know the just of it. I am 24 like I told you. I am a fabulous bartender.” Toni said, flicking her hair behind her shoulder for dramatics.

Cheryl giggled at her antics.

“I sometimes feel I wasn’t dealt the most fair hand in life..but I like to think I make the most of it….”

Cheryl nodded and felt Toni’s words in her heart. It was a sadness for the shorter girl, but also a jealousy. The redhead hadn’t been dealt the best hand either and yet...she found herself being miserable a majority of the time while Toni looked..carefree. She wanted that desperately. To be able to overcome. To be able to realize that her life wasn’t always fair but she was still here, she was still trying.

“You know about my shitty ex-boyfriend, I have my fair share of shitty ex-girlfriends too.” the pinkette laughed.

Cheryl felt her cheeks redden and she dug her nails into the leather of the couch. She couldn’t help but think Toni brought that topic back up on purpose. They had discussed that Cheryl's first night here, but...the redhead took it as another sign.

“Oh! I also love photography. It’s like my favorite thing ever honestly. It’s kind of my escape...if that makes sense.” Toni whispered.

Cheryl willingly moved closer to Toni this time, being physically drawn in by her words. “It makes complete sense…” the redhead said as their eyes met briefly.

Toni smiled and looked down at her hands, a blush on her cheeks as well.

“What do you like to take pictures of?” Cheryl asked.

The shorter girl moved a couple inches closer as she spoke. “I can show you some stuff on my phone. I mean...I have a real camera that I take out with me, but sometimes when I don’t have that I just use my phone.” she explained as she opened her camera roll.

Cheryl wrung her hands together nervously, Toni so close now that the redhead could count her eyelashes and she could see her teeth biting into her bottom lip as she scrolled on her screen. 

“Here is one I took of Fangs last week.” Toni announced as she turned her screen towards Cheryl.

It was a black and white image of the dark haired boy. His back was to the camera and his muscular arms were above his head as he shook a cocktail shaker. It was a simple image, but the way Toni had captured it made it so much more complex.

“That’s beautiful Toni.” Cheryl said as she eyed the portrait.

Toni shrugged and clicked off her screen, her eyes meeting Cheryl’s again, a few seconds longer than last time. “I...ummmm.” the pinkette cleared her throat. “Am going to have another joint…” she leaned forward to her wooden box and grabbed another, placing herself right back next to the redhead, their legs brushing when she sat.

Cheryl watched her light the joint again and she felt her mind swirling. She wasn’t that drunk so she couldn’t blame it on alcohol, but the desire to kiss Toni was starting to become too much. An idea began to form. She took a deep breath in and spoke quietly before she could change her mind. “Can...can I take a hit?”

Toni nodded and went to pass over the joint.

“You again first.” Cheryl whispered, her eyes not breaking contact with the shorter girls.

Toni kept her brown eyes fixated on Cheryl’s as she inhaled the smoke into her lungs.

Cheryl leaned forward and placed her hands on each side of Toni’s face and held them there. She leaned forward so that her lips were mere inches from Toni’s and squeezed lightly on Toni’s cheeks so that her lips parted slightly. The redhead moved even closer, her warm breath falling onto Toni’s plump lips as she waited.

Toni held the inhale for a few more seconds, knowing now what Cheryl had planned. She placed a hand on the back of Cheryl’s neck and her lips brushed slightly against Cheryl’s as she exhaled the smoke between the redhead’s waiting lips.

Cheryl breathed in, her gaze held onto Toni’s as she exhaled the smoke back out of her lungs and into the dark room.

Without a word, both girls kept a hold onto each other and reconnected their lips in a soft kiss. It was slow at first, slow and deliberate. Both not wanting to move too much, afraid that if they did the moment would be over before it even started.

Cheryl moved her hands from Toni’s cheeks to the back of her neck, pulling her closer as Toni’s hands slid down to the redheads hips.

The redhead felt her body heating up quickly, her hands itching to explore Toni’s body, but she kept them firmly on the other girls neck, not daring to move them yet. This kiss was unlike anything Cheryl had ever felt in her whole 24 years of life. It was like she knew everything about Toni, but nothing about her at the same time. It was desire being unlocked from the darkest parts of her soul, desire that was hidden so long, desire that was shoved forcefully down for as long as she could remember. She wanted to cry but smile at the same time. She wanted to run her hands through Toni’s hair and hold her there so this feeling would never disappear.

Cheryl wasn’t sure who deepened the kiss, but before she knew it she felt Toni’s tongue slide into her mouth, causing a whole other flood of emotions to take over her. She whimpered into Toni’s mouth as she gripped harder on her neck. The overwhelming feeling of euphoria that was sweeping over the redhead was quickly replaced by shock and fear. It was like her mind finally caught up to what her body was doing and without a hesitation, she shoved Toni away from her. A shove so firm that Toni was on her back on the leather couch.

The pinkette’s eyes widened as she sat up to see what was going on. “Cheryl...I...oh my god...I’m sorry, I’m so sorry..I thought…”

Cheryl felt her stomach flip with guilt when she saw the panic and hurt in Toni’s eyes. She knew Toni did nothing wrong. It was her. It was the conditioning that what her and Toni had just done, what they were doing, was completely and utterly wrong. But god, it felt so right. She wanted to grab Toni’s hands in her own and explain to her what was going on, but the embarrassment was too much. If there was one thing Cheryl could not stand it was being embarrassed. “I..I have to go.” the redhead said as she stood up quickly.

Toni grabbed for one of Cheryl’s hands gently to stop her. “It’s late...please...you’ve been drinking, please don’t leave..you can stay in my bed again, I’ll sleep out here. I promise I won’t be here when you wake up. I have an early shift so you can sleep as long as you need.”

Cheryl weighed the options in her head. She shouldn’t leave in the dark, she had been drinking and now smoking too. She had already spent every night in Toni’s bed since she had been there so it made sense. She slid her hand out of Toni’s grip, nodded her head and made her way to the familiar bedroom. She had to get behind the door before Toni saw her completely break. She shut the door firmly and pressed her back to it as she slid down the wood to sit on the floor, laying her head into her palms which rested on her knees. She felt the tears threatening to spill out in combination of embarrassment and frustration with herself. She inhaled deeply and exhaled shakily, not wanting Toni to hear her cry. 

The sound of footsteps approaching the door caught Cheryl’s attention and she held her breath. She could tell Toni was trying to be quiet but that was impossible in the old apartment. The footsteps stopped at the door and the redhead heard a small thud against the wood and felt a slight pressure against the door followed by stillness.

Cheryl didn’t have to look under the door to know what it was. She knew Toni was back to back with her against the door, whether or not the bartender knew it. This gesture made the redhead even more distraught , taken aback by Toni’s compassion again. She let her arms fall to her sides and pushed down on the shag carpet to stand up. She made her way over to the bed, collapsed onto the surface, curled under the soft purple blankets, and softly cried herself to sleep.

*****

The next morning Cheryl awoke feeling worse than she had when she was actually hungover. She was emotionally drained and knew something had to give. She couldn’t keep doing each day like this and hurting Toni in the process.

She got out of bed, took a deep breath and swung open the door, ready to talk to Toni...but no one was there. Cheryl checked the couch just in case she was under the blankets but there was no one… 

Cheryl knew where to find her, remembering Toni had mentioned her early shift. She opened the front door and hurried down the metal stairs. She made her way to the front of the building and took one more calming breath before opening the door to the bar.

She let out a sigh of relief when she saw the small girl in the middle of the room, a broom held firmly between her hands as she swayed to the beat of a country sounding guitar coming from the jukebox. 

Cheryl approached her tentatively, her eyes cast down with shame as she got closer. “Toni….”

The pinkette stopped her movements and gave Cheryl a smile.

“I….” the redhead began.

Toni put a finger up to her own lips and dropped the broom onto the floor. She reached for Cheryl’s hand “Dance with me.”

_ I used to spend my nights out in a barroom _

_ Liquor was the only love I've known _

_ But you rescued me from reachin' for the bottom _

_ And brought me back from being too far gone _

Cheryl blinked in confusion as the country song continued to play over the speakers. She let Toni lead her around the room.

_ You're as smooth as Tennessee whiskey _

_ You're as sweet as strawberry wine _

_ You're as warm as a glass of brandy _

_ And honey, I stay stoned on your love all the time _

“Toni...I….” the redhead started again. 

“Cheryl I know you’re sorry. “ Toni said kindly. “But I am too...if I misread or overstepped or …”

Cheryl shook her head profusely. “That’s exactly what I didn’t want. Toni I initiated ...I gave the signs ...please.. the last thing I want is you to be upset.”

Toni nodded and let Cheryl continue as they moved slowly around the center of the empty bar.

_ I've looked for love in all the same old places _

_ Found the bottom of a bottle always dry _

_ But when you poured out your heart I didn't waste it _

_ 'Cause there's nothing like your love to get me high _

_ You're as smooth as Tennessee whiskey _

_ You're as sweet as strawberry wine _

_ You're as warm as a glass of brandy _

_ And honey, I stay stoned on your love all the time _

“You have been nothing short of amazing...God, you’ve taken care of me these past few days unlike anyone ever has. It’s scary. I keep bringing up my past but the hold it has on me Toni...it’s so strong.” Cheryl admitted.

Toni tucked a piece of red hair behind Cheryl’s ear as she continued to speak. 

“I’m not ready for it all, but the voice in my head gets loud sometimes and when I kissed you..it felt...it felt so right and it was quiet …” 

The music continued to lead the girls around the room.

_ You're as smooth as Tennessee whiskey _

_ Tennessee whiskey _

_ Tennessee whiskey _

“I don’t want to keep letting my past affect this..or me..or you..or anything. We don’t have to get into it all now...or maybe even ever but.. the voice in my head telling me I’m wrong or I’m deviant or that I can’t be happy, I’m ready to try to get it to stop.” Cheryl whispered.

Toni pulled the redhead a bit closer, making sure to look directly into her eyes when she spoke. “I get it Cheryl..it’s hard to let the past not get in our way of happiness, trust me…there’s some days where I let things that have happened to me ruin my whole mindset but ..I’ve learned that if I don’t let it go it’s going to hold me down forever. I understand.”

Cheryl bit back tears at Toni’s softness and looked in her brown eyes as well. “I don’t know how long I’ll be here but I’d like to be around you...while I am...I know I just met you but I’m trying to live in the moment and right now I want to spend that moment with you.”

Toni grinned and looked down at their feet, a blush on her cheeks. “I don’t know where you came from or how you ended up on my barstool but I want to be around you too. I just know you are going to be the type of girl who is going to be hard to forget.”

Cheryl’s heart ached at her words, not even mentally prepared to think of the day she would be departing the charming town. “Don’t think about that right now.” She urged with a pleading look. “Let's finish the dance and then I want to kiss you, properly this time.” 

**”** I can’t argue with that.” Toni grinned, dipping Cheryl swiftly to finish off the dance.

Cheryl giggled and paused to look at Toni for a second before she grabbed her face between her hands and connected their lips in a sweet kiss. She made sure to take her time this time. Letting her mind and body take in the sensation of Toni’s lips moving perfectly against her own. She let one of her hands run through soft pink hair, while the other dropped to Toni’s waist to pull her against her body. She broke away reluctantly, her eyes fluttering open to look into Toni’s brown eyes once again, giving her a shy smile.

“And..I could get used to that.” Toni admitted, giving Cheryl a quick kiss on the cheek. 

Cheryl held her hand to her cheek when Toni’s lips left it, holding the warmth there for as long as she could. 


	5. Chocolate Milkshake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toni tells her story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys, here's another update. Idk if anyone really reads this fic but oh well. I hope everyone is staying safe and healthy and taking care of themselves. This is a Toni heavy chapter, my lil bartender. I think a lot of fics (this one included) focus on Cheryl's trauma and although it sucks that we know nothing about Toni, I like to be able to make her own story. There will be more we learn but this is a glimpse into what makes Toni, Toni and I want to hug her and cuddle her. Anywaysssss this fic will probably be 7 chapters, maybe 8 so stay tuned.
> 
> Also again, thank you to Andy (chonisational) on Twitter for editing and correcting all my errors. I appreciate you and I think you are amazing, no matter how much you fight me on it and if you are the only one who reads this fic then I am lucky as it is :). Love youuuuuu

Cheryl sat happily on the barstool, munching on another burger that Toni had called Fangs to bring them shortly after Toni’s shift started. He brought them chocolate milkshakes as well, which the redhead was extremely grateful for, and again a nice substitute from the alcohol she had been consuming. Her and Toni’s evening and now morning had left her feeling drained, but also uplifted. Having Toni forgive her was something she did not want to take for granted.

“You don’t have to stay during my shift if you don’t want to.” Toni said sweetly as she popped the cap off a beer to hand to a customer.

Cheryl sighed and raised an eyebrow. “Toni...where else I am supposed to go?”

Toni giggled and shrugged. “Good point….”

Cheryl wiped her hands off with a napkin and stood up. “Well...if you don’t want me around…” she said playfully walking away from the bar. 

“Hey, come back here, sit back down.” Toni called for her with a laugh.

“Bossy.” Cheryl observed with a shake of her head.

“She always is.” Fangs chipped in from the other side of the bar with an eye roll.

“What? I am not.” Toni countered, crossing her arms over her chest, her lip stuck out with a small pout.

“You are Toni.” Fangs said matter of factly and jumped over the bar to sit next to Cheryl.

“Fangs, don't do that please.” Toni whined, wiping off where his boot had left a mark.

“See...bossy.” The dark haired boy said as he grabbed a fry from Cheryl and popped it into his mouth.

Toni shook her head again, ignoring her friend.

“Hey Red, I’m not working, I was just here to keep little miss back there company but….” Fangs pointed to Toni. “You want to go on an adventure with me?”

Cheryl was amused by his request and eager to see more of the town. She looked at Toni to see her reaction. She was watching the redhead intently, also interested to see what Cheryl would say.

“I..ummm..” Cheryl began.

“Come on..Toni has five more hours here.” Fangs persisted. “I can take you to Sweet Pea’s place, we can check on your truck.”

Cheryl took a sip of her milkshake and nodded. “Okay...I’ll come.”

Toni shook her head with another laugh. “Behave yourselves.”

“Okay mom.” Fangs grinned and walked towards the door.

“You sure you’re good Cheryl?” Toni asked quietly as the redhead stood up from the stool.

Cheryl felt warm at Toni’s apparent concern. “I’m okay.”

“Okay..if you want to talk anymore, you can come over after.” Toni said shyly.

“I already planned on it,” Cheryl admitted, shooting the pinkette a quick wink.

Toni blushed, looked at the ground, and gave the redhead a wave goodbye.

*****

Fangs and Cheryl walked down the street in a comfortable silence to Sweet Peas shop.

“You miss your truck yet?” The dark haired boy asked as he kicked a rock.

Cheryl pursed her lips and shook her head “No...I bought it the same night I got here ...so..not much attachment.”

Fangs looked at her curiously. “Oh well..that sucks then, it failed you right off the bat.” 

“Yeah…” the redhead sighed. “I had a vintage, red convertible back home that I loved but… sometimes you have to let things go.” her mind briefly wandered to her driving with the top down, the wind in her hair, her music blaring in her ears, and her brother sitting next to her.

Fangs nodded in agreement. “And you ended up here.” 

“For now…” Cheryl reiterated. “But yes...I’m slowly accepting that not everything can go as planned.”

Fangs chuckled and kicked another rock. “Somehow I don’t think you’re too disappointed.”

“What does that mean?” The redhead asked.

“Come on...I haven’t seen heart eyes on Toni like that ever and I just met you but ...you have them too.”

Cheryl crossed her arms with annoyance. “I...I just appreciate her kindness.”

“Mmhmm.” Fangs mused. “You lucked out...we are here.”

Cheryl looked to their right and saw a tiny brick building painted white. It had one large garage door that led into the shop where she could see her truck lifted in the air.

“Follow me.” Fangs said as he walked towards the open garage. 

As they approached the building she could hear metal hitting metal and saw a pair of large boots sticking out from under another car in the shop.

“Helloooooo.” Fangs called out.

Another sound of metal clunking on the ground and the man rolled out from under the car, cursing under his breath.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming by?” The man asked angrily.

Cheryl took in his appearance. He was very tall, had dark brown hair and a tattoo of a snake on the side of his neck. It was made to look intimidating but Cheryl could tell the guy was a softie .

“I texted you five times man.” Fangs countered.

The tall man grunted in annoyance and looked at this phone. “Oh….well….my bad.”

Cheryl rocked back on her heels while she waited to be introduced to the man.

“Who is this?” he asked, gesturing towards Cheryl.

“This...is the owner of that headache of a truck in the air. Sweet Pea, this is Cheryl, Cheryl this is Sweet Pea.” Fangs said.

Sweet Pea’s eyes lit up with recognition as he looked at the redhead. “Oooooooo, this is Cheryl.”

The redhead blushed at these words and cleared her throat. “Nice to meet you Sweet Pea.”

He nodded with a smile. “So you want me to tell you about your truck?”

“Sure…” 

“There’s a piece of yellow paper with all the parts I ordered on my desk over there if you want to go grab it, I will go lower your truck and show you a few things.” the tall man said.

Cheryl nodded and looked around the room until she spotted a small, cluttered desk. There were papers piled all over and her eyes scanned for a yellow piece. She moved some papers to the side and saw that the desktop was made of glass with an assortment of pictures organized below it.

Some were black and white and some were in color. Her eyes scanned along the photos, there were pictures of old cars, pictures of men lined up in front of the shop in leather jackets, and one picture in particular caught her eyes. It was a man in front of the shop, a large grin on his face, holding a small girl on this shoulder. She wouldn’t have thought anything of it, but the girl's smile also caught her eye. It was big and mischievous, and familiar. She had tanned skin, and a single strand of pink hair in the mix of brown. It was Toni at around age 7 or 8.

“You need help Red?” a voice asked as she was staring at the photo.

“Sorry...I got distracted.” Cheryl admitted as she finally picked up the yellow piece of paper.

Fangs scrunched his eyebrows to see what she was looking at. Recognition took over when he finally saw. “Oh...a little history lesson I see...I forgot there were even pictures under there..Sweet Pea is so messy it's always covered.”

Cheryl nodded and pointed at the photo. “Is this Toni?”

Fangs bit his lip nervously. “Yes, her and her dad.” 

The redhead didn’t miss the way his tone changed.

The dark haired boy moved more papers out of the way to view the pictures below. “Hey, there’s me!” he said excitedly.

Cheryl looked at the picture. Fangs looked to be about 13, with a tall boy next to him, and a short girl with crossed arms and more pink in her hair. “I’m guessing that’s Sweet Pea?” she laughed.

Fangs nodded. “Mmhmm...damn, I forgot all about these.”

Cheryl squinted a bit closer and noticed the sign in the background. “Topaz Automotive” the sign when she and Fangs walked up had said “Southside Automotive.” The name stuck out to her, but she couldn’t remember why. She wrecked her brain until it came to her.  _ Topaz.  _ That’s what Nancy had called Toni the other day when they were leaving for Pops. “Topaz? Why was it Topaz before?” Cheryl asked.

Fangs cleared his throat and averted his eyes. “Oh...um….yeah it changed a few years back…”

Cheryl could see in his eyes that there was more to the story, but she let it go for now, following the dark haired boy over to where Sweet Pea was waiting for them.

She handed him the piece of paper and he started going down the lines.

“Okay..so as Toni told you, I had to special order a lot of parts for this thing. It’s not in the best shape and to be honest what I ordered may not fix it for too long. It has a major oil leak, a lot of rusting on the underbody, and I am worried about the transmission, but...I am going to do my best.” Sweet Pea said while rubbing his neck with his hand.

Cheryl nodded her approval. “Just do the best you can...I just need to keep driving as far as I can...how long will this repair hold?”

Sweet Pea ran a hand through his dark hair. “I give it a few months.”

“Perfect.” the redhead said as she backed away from the truck. “That will do just fine.”

Sweet Pea grabbed her hand to shake it. “I’ll take care of ya, hopefully I won’t have you trapped here too long.”

“Please...she doesn’t care, she gets to spend time with Toni.” Fangs said, batting his eyelashes at the pair.

The taller boy shook his head. “I’m not here to talk about Toni’s private life, now help me with this car, will you? You too Red.”

Cheryl shook her head and followed the boys to the car Sweet Pea was under earlier.

*****

Cheryl found herself speed walking back to the bar when they were finally done at the auto shop. She was bored out of her mind hearing the two men argue about cars, she still wanted to talk to Toni after their conversation that morning, and her mind was swirling with questions she wanted to ask her.

She told Fangs goodbye and tried not to run up the metal stairs to Toni’s apartment. She knocked on the door and waited to be let in.

The door opened and Toni’s smiling face immediately put her at ease. “Hey, you are just in time. I just put a frozen pizza in the oven.”

“Great.” Cheryl smiled as she laid her purse on the little coffee table.

“How was your day with Fangs?” Toni asked.

“It was….interesting.” Cheryl laughed. “Those two are something.”

Toni giggled at the redhead’s description. “Oh I know...I’m so glad you survived.”

“It was a cute little shop too…” Cheryl said carefully, watching Toni’s reaction.

“Oh...mmhmmm, pretty cute.” Toni responded as she pulled the pizza out of the oven. “How many pieces do you want?”

The redhead watched Toni carefully. “Has the shop been there awhile? And two please.”

“Umm...yeah….it has, I think.” Toni said as she plated their pizza and joined Cheryl on the couch. “Want me to throw on a movie?”

“Sure…” Cheryl answered, her curiosity still weighing on her. She took a bite of pizza and chewed slowly. “I think I saw a picture of you today...when you were young.”

Toni stiffened slightly and stared at the TV. “Yeah? Maybe…”

Cheryl nodded. “If it wasn’t you then some other little girl was trying to steal your pink hair.” 

The shorter girl bit her lip and it quivered slightly. “I...hey, I don’t feel too well, long day I think...do you mind if I go lay down for a little? You’re welcome to hang out here.”

The redhead felt her stomach drop, she had hit a nerve, unintentionally, but she had. Toni didn’t owe her anything, she knew that, but..after their talk this morning Cheryl had wanted to know everything about her.

“Ok….” Cheryl’s voice trailed off. It was already growth for her. The old Cheryl would have told Toni to fuck off, and that she would leave and never talk to the pink haired girl again...but.. Cheryl knew there was a story there. A secret that was painful, just like the ones she was carrying around.

Toni gave her a small smile, got up from the couch, and retreated to her bedroom.

The redhead shifted nervously on the couch, debating on how long she should let Toni be in there alone. She got up and cleaned up the kitchen and walked slowly to the bedroom door. She knocked once and opened the door slowly to find Toni laying on her back starting at the ceiling.

“Hey.” Cheryl said quietly.

“Hey,” Toni responded.

“I pushed you...I’m sorry.” Cheryl began. “I...I got carried away with our conversation this morning and I pushed.” 

Toni sat up in her bed and invited Cheryl to sit next to her. “You didn't mean to..it just...it took me by surprise. Everyone that lives here, they know my story. They know so they never ask. I never have to talk about it..which probably isn’t good but...that’s how it's been.”

Cheryl sat on the bed and nodded as Toni spoke.

“Hearing you ask those questions, it threw me and it took me by surprise, so I apologize for ducking out.”

“Toni...please don’t apologize, I’ve done nothing but duck you since I got here.” Cheryl said quietly.

Toni took a deep breath in. “Well, like I tell you...sometimes it helps to talk about it.”

Cheryl gave the girl a small smile "I'm here....if you want too."

“That picture you saw today, it was of me. I remember that day so clearly... My dad had just bought that shop. The ‘Topaz’ sign had been put up and he was so proud of it. He had used all his money he had been saving since he was 16 years old. He had been working on cars long before then as well, so people in town trusted him.” Toni began.

The redhead inched closer to Toni as she spoke.

“I was 8 years old when it opened, I wanted to look cool for the picture so my mom put a pink streak in my hair that morning. I thought it was so amazing to see our name so big on that building. I was so young but I was just so proud.”

“You had a huge smile in the picture.” Cheryl added.

Toni nodded. “It was exciting. My dad knew the business would be lucrative, he had dreams to open multiple shops across the state overtime.”

The pinkette picked the skin on her nail. “Business was good...it was so good….my dad had never had that much money at one time before. This was also around the time my grandfather was adamant about my dad taking a higher rank in the Serpents.”

Cheryl inhaled shakily, having an idea of where this was headed.

“My dad of course wanted that, he had been wanting to take my grandfather’s place for a while. But...my dad was ummm...more easily influenced than my grandfather was.” Toni continued. “When people see money they see you different. We were becoming one of the wealthier families in town. My mom started dressing nicer, my dad started buying me toys that my friends could never afford, and when people see that….it can get hard.”

The redhead listened to Toni talk, knowing all too well the ugly side of money. The greed. The one track mind. People’s desire to see you fall.

“People started coming to my dad..other Serpents...offering him other opportunities….” Toni’s voice trailed off.

“What kind of opportunities?” Cheryl asked softly.

“A cut in the drug trade...like I told you the other day….drugs were part of the Serpents, but they kept it on the down low...it was only a handful of them.” Toni informed her. “See, I used to go to the auto shop every day after school, I would sit in my mom’s lap at the desk and pretend that I was working, or I would hand my dad tools and stuff...it was so fun to me.”

Cheryl’s heart ached because she could hear the sincerity in Toni’s tone.

“The first time I knew something was up was when I got to the shop after school and my mom wouldn’t let me in. I remember trying to look in the door past her and I saw my dad with about four other Serpents and they were standing close together and talking. It was around that time when I had to start staying with Nancy after school.” Toni explained. “I remember being so confused because I was never allowed around there anymore. Sometimes my mom would even be gone for a couple days and I would have to stay with Nancy or with Fangs or Sweet Pea.”

“Where was she?” Cheryl asked.

“Going on runs for my dad. Drug runs. He started running drugs through the shop, it was less obvious that way. He had agreed to the deal for the other Serpents and by running drugs through his shop, he was getting a huge cut of the money.” Toni said. “Like a huge cut. He didn’t see how risky it was, he just saw the money.”

Cheryl hummed again in understanding, again hearing an all too familiar pattern.

“It went on for a couple years actually. Things started to heat up when I was 13. I started to pay attention. I would listen to my parents fights through the door. My mom was tired of doing the runs, she was tired of my dad putting the family at risk. She told him she expected a better life with this money but she hadn’t seen that. He had started using, blowing money on his own drugs, it was ugly.” Toni breathed. “A few weeks after that argument the police knocked on our door when my parents weren’t home, started asking questions, and sniffing around the shop.”

Cheryl felt her nerves build up as Toni spoke.

“My mom came home that night and I told her about the police coming by. She panicked and immediately started packing. I remember her with a bag over her shoulder and she stopped at the doorway and grabbed my face in her hands. She told me she would find a safe place for us. She told me she was sorry and that this isn’t the life she wanted for our family. She told me she would come back for me if I was patient. I didn’t know what was going on but I agreed. She gave me a hug and I never saw her again.” Toni sniffled.

“You haven’t seen your mom since you were 13?” Cheryl said, stunned.

The pinkette nodded. “Yes, and my dad was arrested the next day. The other Serpents snitched for less jail time of their own. They told the police about the drugs being run through the auto shop and basically blamed it all on my dad. I haven’t seen my dad since then either. I didn't want too...”

“You haven’t seen either of them?” Cheryl questioned, still shocked.

Toni shook her head. “Open the drawer to that nightstand and get out that postcard in there.”

Cheryl did as she was told and leaned over to open the drawer to the small nightstand. It was empty except for a solitary piece of paper. She didn’t look at it, but handed it directly to Toni.

“I got this in the mail, probably a year after everything. It was from my mom.” Toni explained, showing the postcard to Cheryl.

“It says Riverdale on the front?” the redhead said in a confused tone.

“Mmhmm, another Riverdale she found...somewhere on the ocean, I’m not sure where.” Toni mumbled, gesturing to the ocean waves on the background of the postcard. “But never came back for me to take me there...and I can’t find it on any map.”

“I’m sorry Toni.” the redhead said.

“Don’t be...I mean I was embarrassed for awhile, especially when they took our last name off the auto shop. It was hard. I’ve proved myself in the town since then. I felt like I had too. That I was different, that I made money on my own, and legitimately. Of course no one ever blamed me, but I blamed me. It was hard.”

“Wow...I...I admire you.” Cheryl admitted. So much had happened to Toni but Cheryl would have never guessed, the way she carried herself was so much different then how the redhead did.

“I can’t believe I told you that….” Toni chuckled. “Wow…”

“Thank you, I know it wasn’t easy.” Cheryl said quietly as she scooted closer to Toni and carefully laid her head on her shoulder. "Has your dad written you?"

"I don't know...when he was arrested I lived with my grandpa for a little and then I moved in to here..on my own..that's how I like it." Toni sighed. "So he doesn't have my address and I know no one would give it to him out of respect for me."

"That's a lot." the redhead whispered, nestling her head on Toni' shoulder.

Toni immediately relaxed, laying her head on top of Cheryl’s. “Can you do me a favor?”

“Of course,” The redhead said, sitting up,

“Keep this...maybe you’ll find this ‘safe” place when you reach the ocean.” Toni whispered, handing the postcard to Cheryl.

“Are you sure Toni?” 

“Yes...I don’t need it anymore...plus something to remember me by.” She smirked.

Cheryl grabbed it delicately and set it back on the nightstand. “I’ll have no problem remembering you.” she said softly, looking into Toni's brown eyes.

The pinkette blushed and averted her eyes down.

"Toni...?" Cheryl whispered.

"Yes?" she responded, reconnecting her eyes to Cheryl's.

"Can I kiss you?"

Toni nodded and connected their lips, feeling all of the redhead's emotions in the simple act. She broke away to look into her eyes. "Thank you for listening."

"Always." Cheryl promised, connecting their lips once more.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey all, here is a little update for you. I will say:
> 
> Trigger warnings: Mentions of suicide and death
> 
> Also a smut warning.
> 
> But hope y'all like this, its a bit long but there's a lot going on. Talk to me on twitter @tonicheryltopaz and as always thank you to the wonderful Andy @chonisational for keeping me motivated and correcting all my typos and errors lol. Without her I would be staring at blank word docs for longer then I already do.

Cheryl had slept peacefully again, even more so on Toni’s shoulder. It was the first time Toni had fallen asleep with Cheryl and the redhead was content to say the least. She woke up the same way she had remembered closing her eyes. It was like the two had not moved all night, desperate to keep the physical contact.

Last night had been special to Cheryl. She had spent the majority of her days so far in Riverdale floating around in a haze, feeling a disconnect from her old life, and a yearning for a new one. Navigating through her life struggles in the form of a kind bartender. Last night Toni had opened up to her and it had Cheryl looking at things in a whole new light.

There were many moving parts to it. On one hand, Cheryl was eternally grateful that Toni had trusted her. She had been vulnerable and the redhead could tell that it was not easy for Toni to talk about what she had talked about. On the other hand, it was comforting to Cheryl to know she wasn't alone in the dark parts of her mind. To see that Toni had those dark parts too, it made things less heavy. That in itself was what was scaring Cheryl the most. The fact that she trusted Toni so much. She trusted her more than anyone else in her existence. Maybe that was naive of Cheryl, to trust the first person to show her any genuine care. However, it seemed deeper than that. There was  _ more _ to this.

A sleepy groan next to Cheryl caught her attention. She sat up to see a sleepy Toni looking at her through squinted brown eyes.

“Good morning.” Cheryl said quietly, watching as Toni rubbed the sleep from her eyes.

“Morning...I could hear you thinking.” Toni mumbled as she stretched her arms over her head.

“Hear me thinking?” the redhead asked curiously.

Toni nodded and sat up with her back against the pillows. “Yeah...I don’t know it's like an energy shift. I could feel you sitting here awake, and your mind was buzzing.”

The redhead tilted her head to the side, intrigued by Toni’s response. “I was thinking….loudly I guess.” 

“See.” Toni grinned as she stretched one more time. 

Cheryl chuckled and shook her head. “It’s weird that you know that..”

“Why?” the other girl challenged, eyeing Cheryl with wonder.

“I feel exposed…” she blushed. “But...also….fortunate.”

Toni nodded slowly, processing what she was hearing. “Same...yeah...same.” she settled on.

“And..” the redhead continued. “I’m just not really sure what I am supposed to do about it.”

Toni nodded again, angling her body so she was now turned towards Cheryl. “Well...I think we just...embrace it for now...I mean...the connection is..undeniable..don’t you think?”

Cheryl’s heart fluttered at the words. Connection. She felt such a connection to Toni, and it  _ was _ undeniable at this point. There was no harm in indulging in it for now. “A connection..” she tapped her finger to her bottom lip.

“It’s something…” Toni’s voice drifted again, waiting for Cheryl to fill in the blanks.

“There’s no harm in indulging in  _ something _ .” the redhead shrugged. She tried to play nonchalant but she knew that no matter how temporary this was, spending any more time with Toni would just make it hurt that much more when it came time to leave. But yet...it seemed worth it right now. If she got to spend the next few days with this girl then walking away with that memory would be more prominent.

“You’re thinking loud again.” Toni laughed as she rolled off the side of the bed to stand up.

Cheryl sighed. “I am….” her eyes wandered around the room, looking for an exit from the conversation when something caught her attention. “Toni?”

“Yes?” she asked, as she stood in front of her dusty mirror, throwing her hair into a bun on top of her head.

“Is that your camera you use for photography?” the redhead asked.

Toni walked over to where it was hanging off a hatrack on the wall and tapped it once with her finger. “That is her.”

“Are you off today?” the redhead asked, arching an eyebrow cursorily.

Toni grinned, having an idea of where Cheryl was going with this. “Not until night shift.”

“Perfect. Show me where you like to take pictures.” Cheryl suggested.

The pinkette blushed. “You really want me to show you?”

“Of course.” the other girl encouraged. “I have to continue my tour of Riverdale.”

Toni grabbed her camera off the hook and held it between her hands. “Okay...we can run back to the motel and then head out.”

Cheryl hopped up off the bed. “Let’s go.”

*****

Once the girls were outside, Cheryl began walking in the direction of the motel when she noticed Toni wasn’t following her.

Cheryl saw her standing timidly at the bottom of the metal staircase. “Toni?”

Toni walked towards Cheryl avoiding eye contact.

“What’s wrong?” the redhead asked, alarmed by Toni’s change in demeanor.

“I’m all about exercise, but I thought I could drive us today, we can get around faster.” Toni said quietly.

Cheryl arched an eyebrow. “Yeah, that’s fine, where’s your car?” she asked, never having seen Toni drive before or even mention a vehicle.

The pinkette tried to hide a smile. “That’s the thing….”

“What?” Cheryl asked, a huff of annoyance in her tone.

“Just follow me.” Toni said as she walked around to the side of the bar. 

There was a metal garage door that was so rusted into the bricks that it was hard to even make out. Toni bent over and reached for a handle, pulling upward to slide the door open. She stepped inside and pulled a string of a lightbulb that was dangling from the ceiling, illuminating the garage in an amber light.

Cheryl followed her in and looked around. There were boxes everywhere, along with what looked like a bunch of old car parts. In the middle of it all, the redhead saw something that made everything make sense.

It was a motorcycle. It stuck out being the shiniest thing in the room. Not a speck of dust was on the black paint, even though everything surrounding it had years worth of dust piled up. There was an even shinier purple helmet sitting on the leather seat.

“I get it now.” Cheryl laughed nervously as she eyed the bike. 

“What do you think?” Toni asked as she walked over to it, gripping one of the handlebars in between her fingers.

“I think it’s well taken care of.” Cheryl observed, admiring the shine again.

Toni giggled. “Thank you, but I meant what do you think about riding on it?”

Cheryl paused for a moment. She thought she would be more terrified then she was. Being on the back of a motorcycle was something Cheryl never would imagine in her wildest dreams. It would send anyone in her old life into a spiral if they even heard a rumor of this happening. She didn’t want to do it to prove them wrong, she wanted to do it because she knew Toni wouldn’t put her in danger.

“I’m down.” she said simply.

Toni’s eyes widened as she lifted the helmet off the seat. “You are?”

Cheryl nodded and walked closer to the bike, running her polished nails over the sleek frame. “Mmhmm, I trust you.”

The shorter girl grinned in victory and handed the helmet to Cheryl. “Have you ever been on a motorcycle before?”

Cheryl shook her head and placed the helmet over her head.

“Well..if it makes you feel better I have been riding these since I was 12. I bought this one after I worked at the Wyrm for about six months. I saved up parts of my paycheck and then I fixed her up.” Toni said proudly hopping onto the bike.

“That does make me feel better.” Cheryl admitted, picturing a younger Toni riding around Riverdale on her bike. “And it looks like you take good care of her.”

The pinkette nodded. “Oh I do. I am usually out here everyday cleaning her.” 

Cheryl smiled at Toni’s dedication and walked around to hop on behind the shorter girl. She carefully lifted her leg to straddle the seat, and placed the purple helmet over her head, adjusting it over her long hair.

Toni teetered back and forth on her feet getting comfortable. “Okay...I’m going to start it, you good?”

Cheryl nodded and waited for the bike to roar to life. When it did it startled her slightly, and she instinctively wrapped her arms tightly around Toni’s body, pressing herself as close as she could. She felt Toni laugh at her action.

“I need to breathe to drive.” she laughed again.

Cheryl gulped with nerves and loosened her grip slightly, still making sure her hands were intertwined together tightly.

“Okay, I’m just going to walk us out, close the garage and then we will be on the road, okay?” Toni explained.

“Okay.” Cheryl said simply, trying to keep her composure.

Toni did what she said, walking the bike out slowly. Her feet barely reached the ground so it was a struggle, but she got them out, closed the garage, gave the redhead one more glance, revved the engine once, and eased them onto the main road.

Cheryl gasped at the jolt, even though Toni was taking it easy. She squeezed her eyes shut tight as they picked up speed, but slowly pried them open when she realized they were staying upright and steady. 

She was in awe at the way the landscape was blurring around her. She looked to her left, trying to focus her eyes on an object, but it would already be in the distance by the time she could realize what it was. Her arms were still snug around Toni’s middle, holding tightly as she started to breathe a little easier. Seeing how at ease Toni was made Cheryl at ease. She couldn’t see Toni’s face, but she knew she was probably smiling. It was a freeing feeling really. Cheryl could see the appeal of it. All her senses were heightened. She could hear every  _ whoosh  _ of wind, she could see the blur of every object, she could feel the cool air on every part of her exposed skin, and she could feel every single bump in the road.

It wasn’t a long ride, and Cheryl found herself disappointed about that. Right when she was embracing the experience, Toni was pulling into the motel parking lot and parking right in front of her door. She cut the engine and placed her feet firmly on the ground, gesturing for Cheryl to get off first.

The redhead hopped off and removed her helmet, placing it gently back on top of the seat. Her legs were wobbly at first as they got used to being back on solid ground.

“So...what did you think?” Toni asked carefully, her eyes searching the other girls face for an answer.

Cheryl walked towards her motel door, the key between her fingers as she motioned for Toni to follow her. “It was….amazing. That’s the first word that comes to mind.” she explained as she twisted the old lock, opening the door for the pair.

Toni beamed with excitement at Cheryl’s disclosure. “Really? Do you mean that?”

Cheryl nodded. “I do. It was...a combination of things.” she began. “I feel like it’s always a combination of things with me….”

Toni smirked. “Go on…”

“It was so freeing, literally as cliche as it sounds, to feel the wind on my skin, to see the world passing me by so quickly. It was enlightening. The other part of it was you.” Cheryl stated.

“Me?” Toni asked.

Cheryl nodded again. “Yes..you were so in your zone. It was like watching an athlete, someone who has trained for years on a sport. You were so comfortable, so at peace. I felt no tension in your body while I held on, literally none.”

Toni sighed happily. “It is my happy place. Sometimes I just get on my bike and I just go. I just ride it until I know I shouldn’t go any further. And sometimes I’m not even thinking, like my mind isn’t racing when I’m riding, it’s just still. And I love that.”

The redhead reached for Toni’s hand, holding it delicately between her own. “I envy that. A place where you are so genuinely yourself, that you have no worries in the world.”

“I think you’ll find that place Cheryl.” Toni said, squeezing the other girl's hand. “But for now, you can ride with me as much as you want.”

The redhead glanced down at their connected hands and felt the corners of her mouth turn upwards. “Thank you.”

Cheryl disconnected their hands and kneeled on the ground to rummage through one of her bags. “You can...make yourself at home.” she muttered to Toni as she continued searching her bag. Once she found what she was looking for she quickly pocketed it, and also grabbed a change of clothes.

Toni had hopped up on the bed and waited for the other girl to get ready,

It didn’t take long until Cheryl was ready to go, excited to see Toni in her element. She was also excited to get back on the bike.

Toni got up and followed the redhead back out the door. “We have a little bit longer of a ride to where I am taking you, hope that’s okay.”

“More than okay.” Cheryl smiled as she hastily put the helmet back over her hair and waited for Toni to mount the bike.

Toni got on and steered them back on the road, turning back in the direction of the bar. They passed the bar and continued on, even going further then the old auto shop. Cheryl’s interest peaked as they continued on wondering where they could be going. 

Toni turned down a narrow road that was lined thickly with trees, and she slowed their speed slightly as she took the harder turns. She coasted downhill and in the distance Cheryl could see what looked like a body of water. As they got closer she could see it was a river. Toni stopped right where the road stopped and helped Cheryl off the bike. They were able to get within a few feet of the river and the redhead could see the current moving quickly.

“What is this place?” Cheryl asked, mesmerized by the beautiful scenery. 

“This is Sweet Water River.” Toni said as she pulled her camera out of a bag she had strapped to the back of the motorcycle. “I usually come here for inspiration. I can always find something to take pictures of.”

“I can see why.” Cheryl mused, still eyeing the dark water that was flowing by.

Toni set up her camera and stood awkwardly by the water. “I’ve never had someone watch me before.” she chuckled. “Except if I was taking pictures of them.”

The redhead felt her mind working and she blurted out a sentence before she could stop herself. “You can take pictures of me.”

Toni’s eyes widened and a small smile appeared on her face. “Okay...yeah..I mean...that would be great.”

Cheryl nodded and held her hands in the air. “Tell me where to go.”

The shorter girl left and motioned to a rock that was close to the water. “If you want to just start by standing there, just so I can get an idea of your presence and we can go from there.”

Cheryl nodded unsurely, approaching the rock slowly. The closer she got, the narrower her vision became. All she could see was the water hitting the shore, all she could feel was the cold droplets hitting her skin. Her ears were being bombarded by the roaring current and she quickly froze in place, not being able to take another step. Her heart began hammering in her ears, she stuck her hand in her pocket, and clutched the object she had tucked away earlier. She did everything she could to ground herself but it wasn’t working.

“Cheryl….” 

A soft voice in the distance and a light touch to her hand brought her back, and she gasped for air as she came back to reality. She saw Toni’s tanned hand clutching her own and that embarrassment from the first night at the bar came rushing back to her. She cleared her throat and brushed Toni’s hand away. “I...sorry.”

“Cheryl...are you okay?” Toni asked.

The redhead felt all the emotions she had been holding release again. She hadn’t allowed herself to feel them sober fully and they were hitting her hard. “I’m so sick of you having to ask me that.”

Toni backed away a couple steps to give Cheryl space.

“No..I’m not sick of you Toni. Please, don’t think that. I am so mad at myself. I hate that I cannot get my shit under control. It’s fucking exhausting. It’s so fucking exhausting.” she felt tears start to fall.

Toni’s face softened and she stepped back towards Cheryl, pulling her close. “Remember the other day when we talked in the morning… You told me some about your past and it made you feel better?”

The redhead thought back to a few mornings ago when she had shared part of her story with Toni and Toni had shared back. Toni had also opened up to her last night, so maybe it would be something that could help.

“It’s a lot Toni…” Cheryl sighed.

“Okay, but... I’m here, you’re here. I am willing to listen.” Toni said, sitting down right where she had been standing.

The redhead slowly sat down next to her, and folded her hands in her lap to stop them from shaking.

“I guess we can start from the beginning.” Cheryl said.

“The best place to start. “ Toni grinned, trying to lighten the mood.

“So I was actually born a twin.” the redhead started.

“Oh wow! Really?” Toni asked, leaning forward to listen.

Cheryl nodded. “Yes. Jason. He was...he was the best brother I could have ever dreamed of. He supported me, he loved me for me, and he was the only person on this planet who knew the true me.”

“He sounds like an amazing person.” Toni added.

“He truly was…” Cheryl whispered. “I umm..I only had him in my life until I was 16.”

Toni reached her hand over to lay over Cheryl’s again. “Cheryl...I..I’m so sorry.”

“Would you believe me if I said that’s not even the worst part?” the redhead said. “He was murdered…by uh...by our father.”   


Toni’s hand tightened over Cheryl’s clearly shocked by what she was hearing.

“I don’t know if I have fully ever processed anything, I don’t know if I ever will. But...my father then actually ended his life after that...and well..that left me alone with my mother.” Cheryl explained. 

Toni squeezed Cheryl’s hand again to let her know she was listening.

“I don’t mean to sound dramatic when I say this but my mother loved Jason with her whole being, and I am not sure if she has or had any ounce of love for me. I don’t even really resent her for that. I resent how bitter she made me. How she made me feel small, when my presence was so big. She used me when she needed me. For a public image, for a pretty face, for business, you name it. I was a strong, consistent presence. If that makes sense.” Cheryl continued.

The pinkette nodded and held firmly to Cheryl’s hand.

“Anyways...one day, shortly after Jason’s death and shortly after my father’s death I had enough. I was tired of the whispers. Some people felt bad for me, but most laughed or made fun of me. The girl whose brother was killed by her dad. The girl whose dad was dealing drugs and the family knew nothing about it. The girl whose brother was killed because he found out about it. It was a fucking soap opera and I was in the middle of it.” Cheryl said quietly, tears falling down her cheeks.

The redhead glanced again at the river as she continued. “I...decided to remove myself from the situation. I had lost my brother, my life was a laughingstock, I couldn’t get back to a ‘normal’ life no matter how hard I tried. So...I went down to a river near my house..”

Tears fell down Toni’s face as she listened, now holding both of Cheryl’s hands.

“It was winter so it was frozen over...I walked out onto the ice and….well, I had texted one of my classmates before this and they showed up with backup..but it was too late. I wanted to go back to shore. It’s like a moment of clarity, a moment of pure sanity where you truly realize what you are about to do and I wanted to stop. I wanted to live. I wanted to find a way to survive on my own. I knew Jason wouldn’t want me to end my life. The weight on the ice was too much and I fell through.” Cheryl shivered.”It was gut wrenchingly cold. God, Toni, I can’t even explain it. It was like I was being stabbed all over my body with tiny knives, it literally felt like I was being ripped apart.” 

“I closed my eyes and knew all I could do was accept it. I wanted to fight but I was below the ice. I drifted out of consciousness and the last thing I remember is seeing the sky. I knew I was out of the water, but I didn’t know how or why.” the redhead explained. “When I finally gained my consciousness I was at the girl’s house who I had texted in a blanket...and I just went home… and we never really talked about it again.” Cheryl sighed.

“You’ve been holding it in all this time?” Toni asked quietly.

Cheryl nodded. “Yeah..that and just pretty much every single part of me. Like...how my mom tried to make us money. She was basically selling herself out of our home, and you know what is sick?”

“I think I know what you are going to say…” the shorter girl’s voice drifted off.

“Yup...she wanted me in on too. I was a fucking high school student? Like. I was your fucking daughter.” Cheryl felt tears coming again. “And...well..as you know..I like girls. Only Jason knew that about me. No one else. Until my mother caught me with a girl in my room….but that’s another story…”

“I can’t even imagine her reaction..” Toni said.

“Let’s just say my mother had some...creative tactics to try to ‘cleanse” me of those ‘impure’ thoughts.” Cheryl said with a shake of her head. 

“Is she who you are running from?” Toni asked softly.

Cheryl paused in thought. “Yes..and no. I just needed to get away from that life. From those memories. From that house. I let myself be a prisoner for so many years, and tricked myself into thinking it would get better. She never got better, and I got more bitter. I was not the same girl when I looked in the mirror, I couldn’t recognize myself. I was turning into her. An unhappy, wretched, angry woman, and I knew I had to leave or I would regret it.”

“Cheryl...I don’t even know what to say, except..I’m even more glad you are sitting in front of me right now.” Toni said sincerely.

“I know it’s a lot to unpack.” Cheryl stated. “I still can’t believe it sometimes. I didn’t tell her I was leaving. I just took what I could...took what money was mine, ditched most of my material stuff and bought that truck to get me as far away as it could..and it brought me here.”

“Fate.” Toni smiled as she leaned forward to plant a kiss on Cheryl’s cheek.

The redhead grinned. “I guess...if you believe in stuff like that.”

“I do.” the pinkette breathed.

“The river...while it is so beautiful...getting close to the water, it took me back to that place. I was so shocked...I mean you’ve seen me freak out already when I am drunk but I never face these things sober so..that sent me.” Cheryl admitted.

“I can understand that, we can totally go somewhere else.” Toni said.

Cheryl shook her head. “No...I will be okay in a second. Plus..I had grabbed this…” she pulled an item out of her pocket and set it between the two girls. “It’s something I grabbed from my room when I was leaving. It was a gift from my mother..I don’t know why I grabbed it. But I wanted to show you it today because you had given me the postcard from your mom last night…”

Toni picked up the object and began examining it. “It's beautifully made.”

“It’s handcrafted. It’s a spider brooch and it’s probably worth more than me.” Cheryl laughed. “It’s real rubies and real gold. My mom always had to be flashy. She gave it to be when I was ten. She had a matching one. It made me feel close to her, until I realized she was just as poisonous and toxic as the spider itself.”

Toni ran her fingers over the smooth surface. “I feel honored that you are sharing your story with me..I really do.”   
  
“Well...that’s how I felt with you last night. Like I said, I know that wasn’t easy for you.” Cheryl said quietly. “But...you can have that..I don’t want it anymore. I want to let go of it all to be honest.”

Toni pursed her lips in though and looked from the brooch to her camera and back to the brooch again. “Actually….. I have a better idea...if you’re down.” 

Cheryl raised an eyebrow curiously. “It depends…”

Toni laughed and stood up, grabbing the brooch in one hand and extending her other to help the redhead off the ground. “I think I have the perfect pose for your picture.”

“I’m listening.” Cheryl said, still intrigued.

Toni handed her the brooch, placing it delicately in her pale hand. “You want to let the past go, let your old life go...how about you throw it in the river?”

A smile spread across Cheryl’s face, which turned into a smirk. “Hmm..kind of metaphorical...like Rose in the Titanic.”

Toni smirked in response. “I didn’t think about it like that, but yes...exactly like that.”

“I like that.” Cheryl said simply.

“Okay...I’ll stand back to the side over here. You take as much time as you need...I will just take some shots candidly.” Toni said softly, giving Cheryl a kiss to the forehead.

The redhead nodded, feeling a wave of nervousness when Toni disappeared from her side and she was left near the water once again. She took a few steps back and took a deep breath. She had to do this. She squeezed the brooch in her hand tightly, making a fist. A couple more cleansing breaths and she looked towards the sky, inhaling deeply. She angled her arm back and held it for a second, so many emotions flooding through her. She felt so at peace in that moment, that the throw itself happened without her even trying. She saw the brooch flying through the air and landing with a small splash in the water. The amount of joy she felt was immense. She turned back towards Toni who was smiling at her.

Cheryl ran to her and quickly pulled her into an embrace. “Toni I did it. I did it!”

Toni buried her face into Cheryl’s shoulder, holding her tightly. “You did it. Wow...that was amazing to witness.”

“Toni..I’ve never felt like this.” Cheryl said, tears falling down her cheeks.

“You did it Cheryl. Thank you for letting me be a part of this, for trusting me.” Toni said, her voice full of admiration for the redhead.

“This is so fucking crazy.” Cheryl laughed, pulling back from Toni to look into her eyes. “Like….who are you? What is life?”

Toni looked back into Cheryl’s eyes. “I know...this is so crazy, but I am loving every second of it.”

“Me too…” The redhead said quietly, leaning in to capture Toni’s lips in a soft kiss.

Toni sighed contently, feeling the redhead’s lips on her own and pulled her in closer, enjoying the warmth she brought to her.

Cheryl brought one of her hands up to cup Toni’s cheek as she deepened the kiss. She felt a few cold droplets of water hit her own forehead and she reluctantly broke away from Toni to look up towards the sky. 

“It’s raining.” Toni pouted as she went to put her camera away.

“Who cares.” Cheryl said, grabbing Toni by the hand and pulling her back to her lips, continuing the kiss right where they left off. All she wanted to do in that moment was kiss Toni. She didn’t care that her clothes were starting to stick to her skin as the rain picked up. She didn’t care that she was freezing cold in the middle of the woods, all she wanted to do was convey to Toni that she wanted to be there with her.

Toni didn’t care either, she let her camera hang off her wrist as she wrapped both arms around Cheryl’s neck, bringing her as close as she could.

They didn’t break apart until Cheryl felt Toni shiver. “We better head back…”

“Yeah…” Toni whispered, breathless. 

“Can you drive us in the rain?” Cheryl asked.

Toni nodded. “Yes, just hold on to me.”

“Not a problem”

*****

Toni got them back to the bar safely, but by the time they got back into the bartender’s apartment they were completely drenched from the rain. Both girls were shivering as they made their way into the small living space.

“T...there’s some dry clothes in my room.” Toni said, her teeth chattering.

Cheryl could only nod as she made her way into the familiar room, immediately stripping off her clothes, more than ready to get them off her body.

Toni walked in after her, stopping dead in her tracks and covering her eyes quickly when she saw Cheryl in front of her. “Oh..my god Cheryl, I am so fucking sorry..I didn’t know...I...I was just going to show you what drawer.”

Cheryl smirked at the blush on Toni’s face and grabbed a blanket off the bed to cover up. “Toni, it’s okay.” she laughed. “I just had to get them off before I became an ice cube.”

Toni timidly walked over to her dresser and pulled out a hoodie and sweatpants for Cheryl, laying them on the bed for her. She walked backwards towards the door, giving the redhead a small wave. “I’ll be out here.”

“Okay Toni.” Cheryl giggled as she quickly changed into the clothes left for her, anxious to feel warmth again. The clothes helped, but she was missing the warmth from Toni being close to her. She exited the room and let Toni go change next. 

She did quickly and emerged to find Cheryl sitting on her couch with her legs tucked under her. “Still cold?” 

Cheryl nodded and scooted over to make room for the shorter girl.

Toni sat beside her and let the taller girl snuggle up to her. 

“Thank you again for today Toni...it was so…” the redhead paused to find the right word. “It was just..needed.”

“Of course, I am happy I could help.” Toni replied, planting a kiss to Cheryl’s forehead and lingering slightly.

Cheryl placed her hand on the back of Toni’s neck lightly, searching her eyes for any inclination that she was having the same thoughts she was. She brought their lips together again, just brushing over them to test to see if Toni wanted to kiss her again. She smiled into the kiss when she felt Toni add pressure, building the kiss as Cheryl found herself moving to straddle the smaller girl on the couch.

The kiss deepened as Cheryl slid her tongue into Toni’s mouth, moaning softly when she felt Toni’s hand place themselves on her hips, holding her gently as the kiss progressed.

Cheryl felt her body heat up quickly as the kiss gained momentum, she broke away from Toni’s lips and kissed down to her neck. 

Toni pushed lightly on the redhead’s hips to stop her for a moment. “Cheryl...are you sure you want to do this?”

Cheryl looked into soft brown eyes and nodded once. “I am so sure. I...know the timing seems rushed but..I want to do something for me for once in my life. I don’t want to have to worry about what someone is going to think about me. I just want to do something for me, Toni. I just want to feel. There’s a void here.” She ran her fingers over her heart lightly. “It’s been there for so long I can’t ... I can’t remember what life feels like without it..but..when I’m here...when I’m with you..I feel like it could disappear” she confessed through tears.

Toni gave her a shy smile and reconnected their lips again in a quick kiss. “Okay..I want to too..”

Cheryl stood up and grabbed Toni’s hand to lead her to the bedroom. 

Toni turned them to gently lay Cheryl down on her back on top of the bed. She crawled on top of her and reconnected their lips again in a slow kiss.

The redhead enjoyed that Toni was taking her time, kissing her slowly, and running her hand gently up and down her side. 

Toni slid a hand under the sweatshirt that the redhead had borrowed from her, and ran her hand over the soft skin of Cheryl’s stomach. 

“Can I take this off?” she whispered into Cheryl’s ear, her hot breath causing the redhead to shiver.

Cheryl nodded and helped Toni remove her sweatshirt. “Can I take yours off too?”

Toni nodded and sat up from the other girl, pulling the sweatshirt over her head. When she looked back down to Cheryl, she was already unhooking her bra and tossing it to the side, so Toni did the same.

Toni leaned back down to kiss Cheryl, their breasts pressing together as she slid her tongue into the redhead’s mouth, moaning softly when Cheryl brought her hands to rest on her back.

Cheryl leaned her head back as Toni broke the kiss to run her lips down Cheryl’s neck, pausing to suck on her pulse point.

Toni continued kissing down Cheryl’s body, tracing her lips over her collarbone, and over the curve of her breast. She paused and looked up at Cheryl to make sure that she was still alright. She received an encouraging smile in return as she took one of the redhead’s nipples into her mouth, sucking lightly while she squeezed her other breast in her hand.

Cheryl ran a hand through Toni’s hair while she relished in the sensations the other girl was providing her. After a few moments Toni kissed across her chest, giving her other nipple the same attention with her mouth.

Toni continued her journey down Cheryl’s body, kissing down her toned stomach and stopping just above the waistline of her sweatpants. 

Cheryl didn’t even wait for Toni to say anything. She quickly tucked her fingers into the waistband and pulled them off with her panties before the shorter girl could even get a chance. 

Toni smirked wordlessly and attached her lips back to Cheryl’s soft skin picking up right where she had left off. She stopped again just above the redhead’s center and adjusted herself between her legs, gripping one of her thighs in each hand, pushing them apart gently.

Cheryl inhaled in anticipation, feeling Toni’s hot breath hitting the wetness that was already gathering between her legs. 

Toni didn’t waste anymore time as she dug her nails into the soft skin of Cheryl’s inner thighs and licked a firm line up her center, flicking her clit with her tongue.

The redhead’s hands fell to her sides and she gripped the sheets with her fingers as Toni’s tongue continued to bring her pleasure. Each stroke of Toni’s tongue had her seeing stars, her hips involuntarily rose from the mattress, trying to get as close to Toni’s mouth as she could.

The shorter girl moved her hands up from Cheryl’s thighs to her hips to guide her back down so her back was on the bed. She sucked the redhead’s clit into her mouth as she guided one of her hands to Cheryl’s breasts, rolling her nipple gently between her thumb and index finger.

Cheryl’s chest was already rising and falling, soft moans slipping from her lips as Toni worked her closer to her peak. She felt Toni stop for a second, moving her lips to her inner thigh to suck lightly as she slid her index finger into the redhead’s center. She moved it in and out slowly, before adding a second finger, setting a steady pace before attaching her lips to Cheryl's clit to suck it into her mouth.

Cheryl closed her eyes and felt Toni quickly building her back up where she had left off. It was only a few thrusts of Toni’s fingers and Cheryl was finding her release, moaning loudly into the room, a smile on her lips as she steadied her breathing.

Toni planted one more kiss to Cheryl’s stomach and slowly removed her fingers, a smile of her own on her face at the redhead’s reaction. She sighed happily and plopped down next to Cheryl on top of the bed.

The redhead turned on her side to look at Toni and tucked a lock of pink hair behind her ear. “Toni...that was...amazing.”

Toni waved a hand and blushed at her words. “No..you were amazing.”

Cheryl rolled her eyes and then let them drop to Toni’s bare chest, finally taking in the view that she did not get to see before. She reached out her hand, tracing her fingers down Toni’s neck and going around her breasts. Goosebumps appeared all over her tanned skin as Cheryl kept her fingertips light, now tracing over her stomach. 

She moved her hand back up to Toni’s breasts, now tracing her fingers around a hardened nipple, but not yet touching it. The redhead grinned smugly when she heard Toni’s breath hitch at the action. She continued tracing around her nipple as she brought her lips to Toni’s neck, sucking a dark mark into the skin. She brought her lips away with a pop and finally leaned down to take a nipple into her mouth, swirling her tongue over it, while she grabbed Toni’s other breast with her hand.

Toni moaned quietly as Cheryl continued giving attention to her breasts. She let her head fall back onto the bed as Cheryl brought her head back up to reconnect their lips in a heated kiss. As their lips moved against each other’s, the redhead’s hand began toying with the band on Toni’s sweatpants. The shorter girl nodded and assisted the other girl in getting her panties and sweatpants off.

Cheryl’s hand moved slowly down Toni’s body, making sure to take her time. She could tell by Toni’s reaction that she was enjoying the anticipation. She stopped just above her center, breaking the kiss long enough to look into Toni’s lust filled eyes. Cheryl placed a kiss to her cheek and moved her fingers lower until she was met with Toni’s wetness, gathering it on the pads of her fingers. She circled Toni’s entrance with her index finger, but brought it up to rub lightly on her clit. 

The redhead moved her finger in slow circles, changing between pressures and speeds until she heard Toni respond with a moan. She continued rubbing her clit, relishing in the way her body squirmed under her touch. She stopped her movements and brought her finger back to Toni’s entrance, sliding it in easily with how wet she had gotten.

She moved it in and out before adding a second finger. She thrusted into the shorter girl, attaching her lips back to her neck as she curled her fingers expertly into her. 

Toni bit into her bottom lip, trying to hold in the moans that she knew were unavoidable. The way Cheryl was making her feel was euphoric.

Cheryl continued thrusting her fingers and used her thumb to rub on Toni’s clit, bringing the girl closer and closer to the edge. She brought her lips down to suck Toni’s pulse point as she felt her clench around her fingers. A few more movements of Cheryl’s fingers and Toni was digging her nails into the redhead’s shoulder, feeling herself come undone.

The redhead watched in awe as the other girl came down, huffing with exhaustion as she let go of Cheryl's shoulder.

“Damn.” was all Toni could say.

“Yeah?” Cheryl asked, removing her fingers from the pinkette slowly.

“Yeah…” Toni responded. 

“I’m so tired.” Cheryl laughed as she stared up at the ceiling.

“Me too. I have no clue how I am going to work after that.” Toni said.

“You could just stay here with me?” the redhead offered, batting her eyelashes at the other girl.

Toni smirked and kissed her quickly. “Trust me, I would much rather. But as always..you are welcome to stay here until I get back.”

Cheryl pursed her lips in thought and glanced around the room. “I think I will.”

“I was hoping you would.” Toni smiled at her.

  
  
  
  
  
  
  



	7. Last Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Im not going to say much here :).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yell at me on Twitter @tonicheryltopaz.
> 
> Thank you @chonisational, for reading and reading and editing and editing. I appreciate yo ass.

Cheryl woke in a fog at 3 am. She had slept like a baby the moment Toni left to go downstairs. She was curled up under the blankets and in Toni’s clothes and that made falling asleep even easier. She knew the bar closed around 3 so Toni should be back anytime. This brought her a sense of contentment as she rolled out of bed. 

She headed to the small kitchen area to make some tea for the two of them. She searched the cabinets, rummaging through an assortment of mismatched plastic cups, the kind that they give kids drinks in at restaurants. She shook her head with a laugh and finally found two mugs. She located the tea bags as well and began filling a kettle with water.

She put it on the stove and looked around the apartment as she waited for the water to boil. It was still peculiar to her, how safe she felt in a place so foreign to her. A place so different from what she knew. Every night there was more relaxing than the last and it was more calming than any night spent in a lavish home. 

She was starting to know what floorboards creaked, which way to turn the knob on the sink to get the water to come out faster. She knew the refrigerator door stuck, so you had to slam it to get it to close. She knew what side of the bed Toni slept on, and how long it took her to fall asleep. She knew the fan clicked on every 5th rotation, and if you didn’t keep it on the medium speed it wouldn’t work. It was starting to feel like home.

The whistle of the tea kettle snapped her back and she removed it from the heat. She poured it into the mugs and waited for it to seep. She heard a key turning a lock and it brought an unimaginable smile to her face. 

Toni pushed open the door, jumping in surprise when she saw Cheryl in the kitchen. “What are you doing up missy?” She smiled softly.

“I just woke up not too long ago and thought I would make us some tea.” The redhead offered.

Toni’s lips turned upwards into a sleepy grin. “That’s sweet of you.”

Cheryl walked both mugs towards the couch and sat down, leaving enough room for Toni to sit next to her.

Toni sat down and held the warm mug between her hands, giving Cheryl a tired smile. “It was a lonely shift without you sittin’ on the other side.”

Cheryl felt her face heat up and took a sip of her tea. “I wanted to come down, but...today wore me out I guess.”

Toni hummed in acknowledgement. “Sometimes emotional exhaustion is more tiring than physical.”

The redhead smirked “Well...yes...but, a little bit from the physical as well.”

Toni bit back a smile, obviously reminiscing on their encounter before her shift. “Yeah...I know what you mean.”

Cheryl took another sip of tea and let a comfortable silence fall between them. She could tell Toni was tired. Her eyes were hardly open and they kept fluttering closed when she thought the redhead wasn’t looking.

“You can go to sleep, Toni.” Cheryl giggled. “I just wanted to see you before I went back to bed.”

Toni placed her cup on the coffee table and stood up, planting a kiss to the top of Cheryl’s head. “I will see you in a couple hours then?”

“See you then.” Cheryl replied.

Toni walked towards the bedroom and stopped halfway, turning back towards the other girl. “Oh! By the way...Sweet Pea..stopped by tonight.”

Cheryl could see the change of tone in her voice. Toni didn’t want to bring up Sweet Pea dropping in. She thought carefully before she responded. “Oh...did he? What did he want?”

Toni looked down at her feet and mumbled her answer. “Yeah..he uh...he asked if we could stop by tomorrow. He made some progress on your truck and wants you to check it out…”

Cheryl pursed her lips in thought, swirling the tea cup in her hand nervously. “Okay...we can do that...I have to stop by and see Nancy...make sure I am caught up on my payments, I lost track of the days.”

“Alright, well, I work night shift again so I can go with you.” Toni offered. 

“I’d like that.” Cheryl said softly.

Toni took a deep breath and nodded. “Goodnight Cheryl.”

“Goodnight Toni.”

*****

Cheryl awoke the next morning on the couch, much to her disappointment. She had every intention of finishing her tea and curling up next to Toni in her bed. Her exhaustion had overtaken her and she had fallen asleep sitting up. She looked around for a clock and squinted at the green lit numbers on the microwave. It was only 8 AM so she knew Toni would still be sleeping.

She got up and quietly made her way to Toni’s room, pushing open the door slowly and finding her way into the bed.

Toni was dead asleep. Her mouth was hanging open slightly, a quiet snore escaping her mouth as she breathed. Her arms were out on either side, making it almost impossible for the redhead to find a free space. As if she sensed Cheryl next to her, she brought one of her arms around the other girl, pulling her towards her.

The redhead planted a kiss to Toni’s cheek and closed her eyes, wanting to get a few more hours of sleep.

She dozed off easily in Toni’s arms and woke up again a few hours later. She felt the other girl stirring and opened her eyes to brown ones looking back at her. 

“Good morning.” Toni said in her raspy voice, even raspier with sleep mixed in.

“Good morning.” Cheryl said with a smile, kissing the other girl softly.

“Damn...I like these wake up calls.” Toni grinned, kissing the redhead back. “What time is it?”

Cheryl grabbed for her phone and brought the screen to life. “It’s already 11.”

Toni hopped out of bed quickly. “Oh shit...later than I thought. Okay..I’m going to shower really quick, and then we can head to the motel if you want. Then to the auto shop?”

“Sounds good.” Cheryl responded.

Toni quickly got ready, allowing Cheryl to shower too before they headed to the motel. They took Toni’s motorcycle, upon the redhead’s request.

Toni parked it and they walked into the motel office to find Nancy.

As usual, the motel owner was sitting in her swivel chair. She had a cigarette in between her fingers as she spun in circles on her chair. She spun and spun until Toni cleared her throat to stop her.

“Oh..ladies...I didn’t see you there.” Nancy laughed.

“You never do…” Cheryl mumbled.

Toni giggled and elbowed Cheryl gently in the ribs. 

“How can I help you?” Nancy asked, placing her cigarette in the ashtray.

“I just couldn’t remember if I was caught up on my days. I know I had paid you for the week but…” Cheryl began.

Nancy held up a hand to stop her, picking up her cigarette again and taking a deep drag. “You don’t sleep here anyways...don’t worry about the money.”

Toni’s eyes widened and she covered her mouth to stop a laugh.

“She doesn’t remember my name, but she knows I am not sleeping here?” Cheryl muttered to Toni, who was still using all her power not to laugh.

“Okay...well...so..do you want me to get my stuff out of the room...in case you need to use it?” the redhead asked.

Nancy waved her hand. “No..no...not at all. I was just making an observation.”

“Okay…” Cheryl said, still confused.

Nancy stared at the girls and blinked slowly, a coy smirk on her face as she lit another cigarette, tossing the old one into the ashtray.

“What?” Toni asked, wondering why the lady was staring.

“You look different.” The old lady said simply.

“You are so exhausting.” Toni groaned. “What do you mean?”

“Smitten. You look smitten. With Carol.” Nancy said, blowing smoke up to the ceiling. “In fact...I’ve never seen you look so smitten Antoinette.”

“Antoinette?” Cheryl whispered, this time elbowing Toni in the ribs.

Toni blushed heavily. “Uhh…..”

“And speechless. Classic. So smitten.” Nancy laughed to herself. “Anyways..don’t worry about the room Charolette, we will figure it out.”

Cheryl rolled her eyes at the lady, but made a mental note of Toni’s reaction to her words. “Thank you Nancy. I am finding out about my transportation today..so I will keep you in the loop.”

“Yes..keep me in the.” the lady stopped the spin around in her chair again. “Loop.

Toni grabbed for Cheryl’s hand and quickly pulled her towards the door. “Bye, Nancy.”

The lady waved and went back to spinning her circles.

“Antoinette?” Cheryl asked again, putting on her motorcycle helmet as Toni quickly mounted the bike.

“Maybe….” the other girl said with gritted teeth. 

“I think it’s beautiful. Why are you pouting?” Cheryl asked.

Toni sighed and planted her feet on the ground, steadying the bike. “She’s just...she’s annoying sometimes.”

Cheryl bit her lip. “Are you sure it’s not because she said you are smitten?”

Toni sighed again. “I can’t be.”

“Why?” Cheryl asked.

Toni shifted nervously on her feet. “I can’t, Cheryl.”

The redhead huffed in annoyance. “Okay.”

Toni shook her head and turned on the engine, revving the bike to life and heading back towards the road.

Cheryl held onto the other girl as she coasted down the road, her mind racing with thoughts. Obviously Nancy had hit a nerve with Toni and the redhead wasn’t exactly sure why. She was confused. Her and Toni had been having an amazing time together, Cheryl thought that was a given. She didn’t have time to continue her reflection before they were parking at the auto shop.

Toni helped Cheryl off the bike and they walked into the garage. There was metal music blasting on the radio as they walked in, and the smell of gasoline was potent, causing Cheryl to scrunch her nose in disgust. Toni looked around the shop to locate her friend and walked towards a car that was lifted in the air.

The tall man was standing below it, staring upwards, oil stains all over this face. He held a hand under his chin in thought and did not even notice the two girls walking towards him.

“Sweet Pea.” Toni said simply, getting her friends attention.

He turned, startled and gave them a genuine smile. “I’m so glad you two are here. I needed a break, and Cheryl, I  _ have _ to show you your truck.”

Cheryl gave Toni a quick glance as they followed Sweet Pea over to her truck. It was on the ground this time.

He opened the driver door and tossed the keys to Cheryl. “Turn it on.” he said excitedly.

Cheryl grabbed the keys hesitantly and sat in the driver seat. She slid the key in the ignition and turned it harshly. It sparked to life quickly, causing her to jump in surprise.

“Can you believe it?” Sweet Pea said with enthusiasm. “I took her for a test drive today. She is riding so smooth. Probably better then she had in years.”

Cheryl swallowed and did her best to seem excited. “That’s awesome, Sweet Pea. I can’t believe you got it done so quickly.”

“Well..not yet, but I mean in another day she will be road ready.” He grinned happily.

Cheryl sat quietly in the driver seat, the engine rumbling in the background. She should have been excited. She should have been grateful that her car was fixed so quickly. She looked at Toni who was staring at her shoes, not even looking at the truck.

“Toni! Can you believe I was able to do this so fast? Damn..I impress myself daily.” Sweet Pea praised himself.   


“Yeah...cool. I’m going to step out for a cigarette..I’ll be right back.” Toni said quietly, backing away towards the exit.

Cheryl followed her with her eyes, feeling anxiety settling in her stomach.

Sweet Pea saw Cheryl’s concern and spoke up. “Hey, don’t worry, sometimes she gets weird in here...she will be okay in a second.”

“I don’t think it has anything to do with the shop.” Cheryl said softly as she hopped out of the truck, quickly following the other girl outside.

She wasn't hard to find. She was leaned on the front brick wall of the building, a cigarette hanging lazily between her fingers. The redhead approached her slowly, her mind going a million miles an hour, not even knowing what to say to her.

“Hey.” she settled on.

“Hey.” Toni said in response, not making eye contact.

Cheryl stood awkwardly, hoping that Toni would just start talking. She didn’t want to press her too much. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah…” Toni answered, taking a drag of her cigarette.

“Toni….” Cheryl began. “I...I know it hasn’t been long but...I think I know you a bit better than this. I know when something is wrong.”

Toni sighed and flicked the cigarette into the parking lot. “I...I don’t know Cheryl. I honestly don’t know what to say.”

The redhead looked at her suspiciously. “Can you just talk to me?”

Toni looked at the sky, still avoiding eye contact with the redhead.

Cheryl felt anger start to build. She tried to push it down, not wanting her harsh words to come out and silence Toni even more, but she wanted answers. Toni had not even acted this way during their time together, and it was hitting a nerve with the redhead. “Toni, would you just fucking talk to me?”

Toni licked her lips and sighed. “Cheryl….do I really need to spell this out for you?”

Cheryl shook her head and took a few steps back, still surprised with Toni’s attitude. “Yes actually, I don’t get why you’re being a bitch to me all the sudden.”

Toni pushed off the wall and stood in front of the other girl. “I don’t want you to leave. Okay? I...don’t….want...you...to leave….” she said, annunciating each word.

Cheryl’s jaw dropped slightly. “I….”

Toni continued. “It didn’t hit me. Until now. Until I saw your stupid truck start. It means you can leave and...and I don’t want you to.”

Cheryl ran a hand through her hair, completely speechless at Toni’s confession.

“Saying it out loud sounds crazy. I just met you but...fuck..I don’t want you to leave Cheryl.” Toni said.

The redhead still stood firmly in place, her mind spinning. “Toni…”

“You can’t tell me part of you didn’t think that too…” Toni said. “What did you think? When your truck started? What was the first thing that came to your mind?”

Cheryl paused for a moment. She knew she didn’t feel excitement. In fact, her first thought was how she could sabotage the truck to give her more time. She wanted more time. She wanted to tell Toni that too, but instead. “I...I don’t know.”

Toni’s face fell. “That didn’t cross your mind? The fact that it’s too soon? That maybe...you wished you could be here longer?”

Cheryl was screaming at herself not to sabotage this, but she couldn’t get the words out that she knew that she wanted to say. Even though Toni was standing right in front of her, desperation on her face, she couldn’t bring herself to admit any of it. “Toni….”

The other girl already looked defeated. “I know this wasn’t all for no reason…”

“We still have a day...Sweet Pea said that himself…” Cheryl responded.

Toni shook her head, stepping closer to the redhead and reaching out for her hands. “But it’s not enough.”

Cheryl felt her heart drop at Toni’s words. She knew she was right. It would never be enough time. Cheryl would have traded anything, any moment of her life to just relive these last few days with Toni over and over again. Nothing had been this significant. Nothing had been this liberating. She had never felt more herself than when Toni was looking at her. The even scarier part was...there was nothing holding her down for anything else. She didn’t have to go home and she didn’t  _ have _ to leave. “Toni…let’s just try to make the most of the next couple days, ok?”

Toni gripped Cheryl’s hands in her own, pouring all her emotions into the redhead. “Cheryl….I...I don’t want to be selfish..but I don’t know how I can enjoy it..knowing at the end of it, you’re gone.”

“We have no choice.” Cheryl said, pulling Toni closer to her. “We will make the most of it.” she planted a kiss to the other girl's forehead.

Toni blinked her eyes, clearing fighting tears. “Okay...you’re right. I have had so much fun with you, Cheryl. So much. That shouldn’t have to change. I’m sorry I poured that on you...I...I’m as surprised as you are.”

Cheryl nodded slowly, knowing she had just as much she could say to the other girl, but she pushed it aside. It would be easier this way. “Let’s get back to the bar, yeah?”

Toni nodded and walked towards her bike. “Yes...let’s go.”

*****

Cheryl sat across from Toni at the bar, holding a glass of water between her hands as she watched Fangs and Toni pass out drinks. She tried to keep the mood light, making an occasional joke to Toni, or tossing her flirty comments here and there, but it was hard to cheer her up.

She was putting on a forced smile for Cheryl, but her eyes still held what she was really feeling. It didn’t help that Fangs was continually bringing it up throughout their shift.

“I stopped by the shop today. Truck is looking sexy.” Fangs said to Cheryl, giving her a wink.

“Yeah...totally.” Cheryl said with all the genuineness she could muster.

“When you going to head out?” he asked curiously.

Cheryl watched Toni grip a glass at his question. “Either tomorrow night...or the day after. I know he wanted to do a couple more test drives.”

Fangs nodded. “He wouldn’t send you on the road if he wasn’t confident. That’s exciting though, I bet you’re ready to get out of this place.”

Cheryl shrugged. “It has been…..” she glanced at Toni. “Better than I could have imagined.”

“Really? I don’t think I have ever heard anyone say Riverdale was better than they imagined. Especially the Southside.” he laughed. “Maybe we should put that on the sign. ‘Riverdale...better than you could imagine.” he joked.

Cheryl shook her head. “Yeah...maybe.”

“Well we will miss you around here. You brought a nice change of pace from these greasy bikers.” Fangs laughed. ”Right, Toni?”

Toni nodded quietly. “I think so too.”

Cheryl looked down at the top of the bar, remembering how over a week ago she was face down on the floor of the very same bar, wanting to forget who she was. As cliche as it sounded, a part of her would always be there, and she knew that. She had found herself here. She faced her demons head on, and it was raw and it was ugly. When you hit a point past rock bottom you always hope someone is there to find you, and Toni did. A stranger, literally and figuratively picked her up off the floor, and she would never forget that.

“Is there any way Toni can leave early tonight?” the redhead asked, looking at Fangs with a small smile.

He looked at Toni who was looking at him confused. “Umm..I guess...if she wants to. Toni?”

Toni gave Cheryl a look and nodded. “Yeah...if it’s cool with you Fangs.”

He looked around the bar. “Yeah..I can handle this. Go ahead.”

Toni gave her friend a pat on the shoulder and hopped over the bar. “Where to?”

“Your place?” Cheryl asked shyly.

Toni arched an eyebrow in confusion. “You wanted me to leave work early...just to go to my apartment?”

“I like it there.” Cheryl said innocently. “I thought we could just hang out, lay low…”

Toni reached for the redhead’s hand and led her to the familiar metal stairs. “Frozen pizza? Because that’s all I got.”

“You know anything is fine with me. I love the frozen pizza.” Cheryl said sincerely. 

Toni opened the door and let them in, immediately heading to the kitchen to start the food, leaving Cheryl standing in the doorway.

The redhead watched Toni walk from the oven to the fridge, and back again. She felt the energy radiating off of her. She knew she couldn’t talk right now, Cheryl couldn’t either. She didn’t want to talk. She didn’t want to dwell. She didn’t want to waste time crying and imagining what could be. She just wanted Toni, in the present moment. She walked up to her slowly, reaching for her hand to spin her around.

Toni looked at Cheryl silently, waiting to see what she was going to do.

Cheryl hesitated for a moment, searching Toni’s brown eyes for anything. She wasn’t sure what she was looking for but whatever it was, it was there. She reached her hand forward, brushing her fingertips over Toni’s cheek. She brought her fingers to her plump lips and ran her index finger over her bottom lip, memorizing how it felt. She traced her fingertips around Toni’s lips one more time and brought them back to her cheek, pulling her in gently. 

Her eyes dropped to Toni’s lips again, they were now parted slightly and steady breaths of air were gently hitting Cheryl’s lips. Cheryl was briefly taken back to the moment she first kissed Toni. On the couch, smoke falling from Toni’s lips and hitting Cheryl’s lips. She moved the hand from her cheek to the back of her neck, pulling her in so that their lips finally touched.

The kiss started slow, light touches that left Cheryl craving more. She pulled Toni even closer, wanting to feel her as close as she could. She made sure her lips moved insistently, telling Toni everything she couldn’t say out loud. 

Toni reached behind her blindly and switched off the oven, never breaking their kiss. She brought her hands to Cheryl’s hips, pushing her back towards the bedroom, knocking into the end table as they moved, a lamp clanking onto the floor. They paid no mind to the disturbance, continuing to their destination, still making sure their lips never separated.

Cheryl felt the back of her thighs hit the mattress and she laid down on it, bringing Toni down with her. 

Toni brought her lips down to Cheryl’s neck, kissing it softly and stopping every once and awhile to suck the skin into her mouth. She kissed along Cheryl’s jawline, going all the way up to right below her ear, and back down until she met her lips again. She brought Cheryl’s bottom lip into her mouth, dragging her teeth over it as she released it. “Are you sure you want to do this?”

Cheryl nodded and went to remove her shirt, pulling it over her head. She reached around to remove her bra and motioned for Toni to do the same. She hooked her fingers into the waistband of her pants and removed them with her panties. Toni mirrored her actions until they were both free of clothing. 

Toni smiled softly, her eyes shining with admiration as she looked at Cheryl laying beneath her. “You’re so beautiful.” 

Cheryl’s cheeks flushed red and she closed her eyes as she felt Toni run her fingers along her stomach. She shivered under her touch and dug her teeth into her bottom lip when Toni’s hands ghosted over her breasts.

Her pulse instantly picked up when Toni’s mouth replaced her hand, and soft lips moved over the curve of her breast. Cheryl’s hands grasped for pink hair as Toni brought one of her nipples into her mouth, running her tongue over it deliberately slowly, building Cheryl’s arousal quickly. 

Cheryl’s grip in Toni’s hair tightened as she kissed over to her other nipple, sucking it between soft lips and giving it the same attention as the other. 

The redhead squirmed beneath her, raising her hips off the mattress, searching for some sort of relief. 

Toni broke away from Cheryl’s breast and sat up slightly so she could look into the redheads eyes. She held eye contact and moved her hand slowly down Cheryl’s body, not stopping until she reached her destination. She watched Cheryl’s eyes close in pleasure when she started slowly rubbing her clit. She wanted to enjoy this moment, building her up slowly, wanting her to feel everything.

Cheryl felt her body heating up at Toni’s touch and she felt her fingers move down to her entrance, gathering arousal and then continuing to rub on her clit. 

“Open your eyes baby” Toni said quietly, planting a kiss to Cheryl’s forehead as she increased the pressure of her fingertips. 

Cheryl bit back a moan and forced her eyes open, trying to stop them from fluttering closed as Toni’s fingers moved back down to her entrance. They closed again involuntarily when Toni slid a finger into her, thrusting it slowly before bringing it back out to add another. 

“Look at me Cheryl.” Toni said, but not demanding. She was genuine. She wanted to remember everything about this. 

The redhead opened her eyes again, doing her best not to let the pleasure force them closed again. 

Toni began a steady rhythm into Cheryl, curling her fingers into her and using her thumb to brush against her clit.

The redhead felt her orgasm building quickly, bringing an arm to wrap around Toni’s back, holding her in place. 

“Eyes on me when you cum baby.” Toni instructed, keeping her pace, knowing Cheryl was almost there. 

Cheryl locked her eyes onto Toni’s as she dug her nails into tanned skin. She felt herself falling over the edge, never taking her eyes off Toni as she moaned through it, breathing heavily as she came down. 

Toni planted another kiss to Cheryl’s forehead and removed her fingers slowly. 

The redhead didn’t want to linger on the heaviness of it all. She instead sat up and reconnected her lips to Toni’s. Starting a slow kiss and sliding her tongue into the other girl's mouth. 

She flipped them over easily, Toni now on her back. 

Cheryl took a moment to gaze at Toni’s body, so perfect and flawless in front of her. She wanted to pour all her emotion into this moment and it took everything in her to not shed a tear.

She placed her hands on Toni’s breasts, moving them in circles and felt her nipples harden against the palms of her hands. She squeezed them again before moving her hands down over her toned stomach. She loved how soft her skin was on her hands but she wanted to feel it on her lips too.

She replaced her hands with her lips and kissed from Toni’s stomach and back up to the valley of her breasts and back down again. She stopped just above Toni’s center and lowered herself to situate between her legs. She gripped one of her thighs in each hand and gently pushed them apart.

She paused a moment, looking up at Toni to give her a grin which was returned with an encouraging smile and nod of consent.

Cheryl leaned forward, licking up Toni’s center, earning an instant moan from the other girl. She sucked Toni’s clit into her mouth and felt hands immediately bury themselves into her hair. She moved her tongue over Toni’s clit as she carefully slid two fingers into her entrance, pumping slowly as she continued the movements of her tongue.

Toni’s hips raised off the bed to meet Cheryl’s mouth and her hands held more firmly to Cheryl’s hair.

The redhead kept the perfect motion with her fingers and tongue, bringing Toni quickly to her climax. She didn’t even have time to process before it was hitting her out of nowhere and she moaned loudly into her bedroom.

Cheryl lifted her head and kissed up to Toni's stomach as she removed her fingers, giving Toni an innocent look.

“That was….perfect.” She said with a heavy breath. 

“It was.” Cheryl agreed. Her heart was heavy. It had been perfect, and it felt like a goodbye. Like they were putting every single feeling into every touch. 

“I’m glad we did it but...it just makes it harder.” Toni whispered.

Cheryl laid in bed, eyes fixed on the ceiling. She shoved everything out of her mind. It was routine and it was easy, she didn’t want to feel right now. If she did, she would never leave this bed. “Shhh.. let’s just lay here.”

Toni pouted her lip out but nodded. “Okay, Cheryl.”

The redhead laid awake all night, wrapped up in the scent of lavender and Toni’s arms. Her eyes didn’t close once and she knew Toni’s didn’t either. She felt her awake all night, her breathing steady, but alert. Her arms never once unwrapped from Cheryl until the sun came up.

*****

Both girls reluctantly got out of bed, not saying a word as they got dressed for the day. The ache in Cheryl’s heart was becoming so heavy she could barely speak. She was afraid that if her mouth opened she would never stop crying. 

She had felt like this when she lost Jason, that gnawing feeling of dread and looming anticipation. 

“You want me to drive you to the shop? To pick up the truck?” Toni said, breaking the silence.

“Yeah...then I have to go to the motel and get my other bags.” Cheryl’s voice cracked slightly.

“I can go there too...make sure it’s all in order.” Toni responded.

Cheryl nodded and picked up some more loose items she had around Toni’s room. She tucked her purse under her arm and waited for Toni to follow her outside.

No words were spoken as they mounted Toni’s bike, the redhead wrapping her arms around her middle like habit now. 

They pulled up to the auto shop and walked inside together, staying in step with one another as they did. 

Sweet Pea was sitting at his desk this time, hopping up to greet them when they walked in. He eyed them with intrigue and noted the dark circles under their eyes. He offered Toni a smile and led Cheryl over to the desk.

“Well… she’s ready to go. I took her on a drive last night and again this morning when I woke up. She’s good as new if you ask me.” Sweet Pea informed her.

“Thank you...truly. You have been very helpful.” Cheryl said, opening her purse to get out her wallet.

Sweet Pea handed her the bill and explained each part and labor cost. 

Cheryl didn’t care, she just nodded silently and handed him a wad of bills. “Should be enough.”

Sweet Pea’s eyes widened at the money and quickly placed it in the drawer. “Damn. Have to get that in the safe. We don’t usually have that much cash around here...but here’s your keys.” He grinned, tossing them to Cheryl who caught them in one hand.

“I have it parked outside. Around the back, you’ll see it. And safe travels, come back and see us sometime.” Sweet Pea said sincerely, still watching the face of his friend.

Toni gave him a forced smile and followed Cheryl out back.

“I’ll follow you to the motel, make sure the truck doesn’t give you any trouble on the way there.” Toni said.

Cheryl nodded and hopped into the truck, clutching the wheel tightly as she started the engine. It came to life quickly, like yesterday and she switched it into reverse to head towards the road. She sighed with defeat as it coasted smoothly down the street, riding even better than it did when she bought it. 

She stared out the windshield, remembering how Toni had found her sitting in the parking lot of the bar, the truck dead in the water. She thought of her genuine smile, her desire to help, her pretending that she knew how to fix the truck. She had been an angel since day one.

Cheryl wiped tears from her cheeks as she turned into the motel, parking in front of her room and waiting for Toni to get off her bike. 

Toni hopped off her bike and approached her with an enthusiasm Cheryl had not seen since the day at the river. 

Cheryl gave her a questioning look as she unlocked her room, letting them both in.

“Cheryl, I figured it out, it’s so obvious.” Toni said excitedly.

The redhead arched an eyebrow as she moved around the room, gathering her belongings. “What is?”

“All this time I’ve just been going on and on about how I don’t want you to leave.” She began.

Cheryl nodded in acknowledgment and pulled her other bag out from under the bed.

“I shouldn’t have been doing that. I should’ve been asking you to stay.” Toni smiled. “Do you want to stay? With me?”

Cheryl paused at the directness of the question. Her hand froze in mid air as she grabbed for her bag and she closed her eyes to stop tears. She wanted to stay with Toni. She did, but that voice that she had been fighting this whole time was still there. Telling her to run, telling her that Toni had been this happy in Riverdale her whole life, she would be happy long after Cheryl was gone. She told herself she had to finish what she started, she had to keep driving. But did she have too? She could ask Toni to go with her. She had nothing to lose, she had all the power, no one was here to hold her back. No one was her telling her she can’t be happy, but still….

Toni stood in the middle of the room, waiting for an answer. Standing so open and vulnerable, doing everything she could so she wouldn’t have to watch the redhead drive away. 

“Toni...I...I can’t.” Cheryl heard herself say, but it was like she was watching the scene unfold in front of her without any control.

The other girl looked down in defeat. “Why?”

The redhead didn’t have a definitive answer. There was no why, and that was the part that made her panic. There was no concrete reason. “I made myself a promise, Toni. I have to keep going.”

“What’s out there? What’s out there that isn’t here?” Toni pressed.

“Toni, I don’t want this to be our last interaction.” Cheryl said, her voice tired.

“But it doesn’t have to be. That’s what I don’t understand.” She argued. 

“It does. Toni...I can’t just fall into your life, live in your apartment and take up space. How would I do that?” Cheryl asked, her voice now getting shaky.

“Because I want you to. Shouldn’t that be enough?” Toni asked.

“It’s not my life. I can’t just insert myself in yours because I feel safe. I’ve never felt safe and I don’t want to hurt you by attaching myself to the first safe place I found. It’s not fair.” 

Toni shook her head and placed her hands on her hips. “I’m not going to change your mind?”

Cheryl felt her throat tighten as she forced out a false reply. “No.”

Toni walked over to her and pulled her in for an embrace, holding her tightly against her chest. She planted a kiss to the top of red hair and pulled back to place a soft one on her lips as well. “Like I told you a few days ago...you’re going to be hard to forget. I don’t think a day will pass from now on where I won’t think about you.”

Cheryl held onto Toni and buried her head in her shoulder, trying to convey everything she was thinking. 

Toni didn’t demand a response, she understood with just that action and let go on the other girl. She sniffled and wiped her eyes. “I..umm...I’ll follow you to the edge of town, just to make sure, okay?”

“Okay.” She whispered.

Toni grabbed one of her bags and Cheryl carried the other while they walked out to the truck placing them in the passenger seat. 

Cheryl paused and glanced at the little motel office. “Do you mind if I go say bye to Nancy?”

“Go for it. I need a cigarette anyway, I’ll be here.” Toni said quietly. 

Cheryl walked across the parking lot towards the building, remembering how strange but welcoming the lady on the other side of the door was. 

She pushed open the door and smiled at the familiar cloud of smoke. 

“Hi there! What can I do for you?” Nancy asked, not looking up from her desk. 

Cheryl stepped further inside and cleared her throat.

“Oh! It’s just you.” The old lady grinned.

Cheryl rocked back and forth on her feet. “I just came to say goodbye and to thank you for letting me stay here.”

Nancy leaned back and grinned. “Mmmm….you didn’t stay here anyway but you’re welcome.”

The redhead laughed and reached into her pocket pulling out a wad of cash. “I want you to have this.”

Nancy looked over the bills and shook her head. “No...you’ve paid me.”

“Please. I don’t need all of this and… you gave me a place to stay when I needed it the most. It’s a gift.” Cheryl explained.

Nancy grasped the money and held it for a moment. “If you’re gonna stand here and be sentimental...fine… but I’m not using it for myself. I’ll put it into the motel. How's that sound?”

“That sounds wonderful, Nancy. Thank you.”

The older lady nodded and lit another cigarette. 

“And…please take care of Toni for me.” Cheryl said softly.

“Always have. Always will.” Nancy answered simply.

“Bye Nancy.” 

“Bye Cheryl.”

The redhead turned and walked out, surprised with how emotional she felt saying goodbye to the motel owner. She shook her head and found Toni still waiting at her truck.

“Ready?” The pinkette asked.

Cheryl nodded silently and hopped into her truck, exhaling loudly and blinking back tears. She ran her hands over the wheel again, wondering if she was making a mistake.

Toni knocked on the glass, causing Cheryl to roll down her window. “I’ll miss you, beautiful girl.” she smiled, leaning into the car to give her a lingering kiss to the lips.

Cheryl choked out a sob and placed her hand on Toni’s cheek. “I’ll miss you too....so much.”

Toni backed away from the window and towards her bike, sitting on it while she waited for Cheryl to reverse.

Cheryl backed out of the parking spot and turned onto the road. She finally let her tears fall freely. They blurred her vision of the road and she let her sobs echo throughout the cab of the truck. She glanced in her rearview mirror, spotting Toni, driving behind her slowly making sure that she found her way to the highway. She saw the motel vacancy sign get smaller and smaller. She passed the dilapidated bar and blew it a kiss with her hand. She saw the sign for the highway and veered the truck towards it. The next time she glanced up, Toni was nowhere in sight, and Cheryl was alone.


End file.
